I love mindfulness therapies because they
1) Help you to not judge a situation. Eating too much, self harming, when someone says something mean or rude to you, a partner has a attitude with you or didn't show up on time, etc.
2) If you are sad or upset, it helps you to not judge yourself for being sad or upset. Instead of trying to force you to be fixed or feel better, it teaches you to just be okay with feeling emotions.
3) If a partner has BPD or depression, mindful therapy provides you will a lot of helpful techniques to not judge a situation where you may want to fix him or her, or help him or her feel better. A situation where he or she may be devaluing you, or may be upset is also a great time to practice these skills. Mindfulness therapies are not just for people who have depression, BPD,etc. I used to try to fix my loved ones A LOT before practicing DBT skills and found out I'M the one f*king up in that moment and time and I was just making it worse for people I know struggling with intense emotions.
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1) Help you to not judge a situation. Eating too much, self harming, when someone says something mean or rude to you, a partner has a attitude with you or didn't show up on time, etc.
2) If you are sad or upset, it helps you to not judge yourself for being sad or upset. Instead of trying to force you to be fixed or feel better, it teaches you to just be okay with feeling emotions.
3) If a partner has BPD or depression, mindful therapy provides you will a lot of helpful techniques to not judge a situation where you may want to fix him or her, or help him or her feel better. A situation where he or she may be devaluing you, or may be upset is also a great time to practice these skills. Mindfulness therapies are not just for people who have depression, BPD,etc. I used to try to fix my loved ones A LOT before practicing DBT skills and found out I'M the one f*king up in that moment and time and I was just making it worse for people I know struggling with intense emotions.
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About/ info
- New Emotional Core Therapy Video and Book Highlight the Most Effective and Most Inclusive Psychology Approach Available Worldwide to Treat Psychological Stress by Robert A. Moylan, LCPC @Yahoo
- Emotional Core Therapy uploaded by Keith Kelly - "Author Robert A. Moylan is a licensed clinical professional counselor who works in private practice in Illinois. He graduated from Northwestern University and attended Loyola graduate School. Robert has treated people with a wide variety of psychological issues including addictions, depression, anxiety and marital discord."
- Emotional Core Therapy Training Video (1 hr.) uploaded by Keith Kelly - "Five Easy Steps to Loving Yourself in Life. How do we maintain a lifelong loving relationship with ourselves? If there was an answer to this and we could learn to unlock the secret, our lives can be enriched tremendously. In the books “Emotional Core Therapy” and “Emotional Core Therapy for Adolescents” author Robert A. Moylan, LCPC demonstrates how to handle debilitating depression, anxiety and anger by mastering four authentic feelings: Joy, Grief, Fear and Relief. Emotional Core Therapy allows you to live a full life without regrets. This approach teaches one to release toxic feelings and thought by using five simple psychological steps. "
- Emotional Core Therapy by Robert A. MoylanAuthor shows readers how to gain emotional balance by learning to identify, process four authentic feelings of joy, grief, fear, and relief. Emotional Core Therapy is one of the most important discoveries in the history of the field of psychology and mental health. With ECT we have discovered the root cause of psychological stress. ECT is also the only psychological approach that can effectively treat the root cause of relationship stress. There exists a cause and effect relationship with stress....They can just numb or alter your perceptions and feelings. Why not learn from them. ECT is the most inclusive therapy approach in psychology circles as any psychology technique (such as art therapy, EMDR, hypnosis, biofeedback, Gestalt Therapy, can all be incorporated into ECT. Even common relaxation techniques like Yoga,Pilates,etc can easily be incorporated into ECT. “Emotional Core Therapy” by Robert A. Moylan, LCPC, demonstrates the power of understanding feelings to keep the body and mind emotionally healthy...."
- Official site - "This is a landmark day in the field of psychology, according to Mr. Moylan because we now have an effective psychology tool to treat all current psychological disorders where the patient has not suffered permanent physical or psychological damage. According to Moylan, ECT can help anyone, even those without a psychological diagnosis. Why? ECT teaches you how to have inner peace and happiness. A goal of nearly all humans. The root cause of stress is entering and leaving relationships that require needs to be met. We sense this stress through our five senses and cause one of four feelings to arise. Those four feelings are joy, grief, fear, and relief."
Flowchart
- Morita (more-e-ta) therapy comes from its creator's namesake,Shoma Morita (To Do Institute). Shoma Morita created Morita therapy to help people feel at ease with his or her feelings. Numerous therapies attempt to change the person into a mold of perfection, but life is not perfect and imperfect feelings, emotions, and thoughts are natural. Arugamama, which means to "accept reality as it is" is a core part of Morita therapy just as non-judgement is a core part of DBT (To Do Institute.n.d). Both Mortita and DBT therapy attempt to help the person accept their unwanted feelings instead of trying to make him or her feel better. Shoma Morita believed that trying to change our negative feelings into happier ones just causes more frustration and does not always work. Shoma Morita felt that the more we tried to change these negative emotions into positive emotions it would overwhelm us more than the original negative emotions (The Morita School.n.d). We all have negative feelings and thoughts, but we should accept that we are having these thoughts and that they are a way of life instead of trying to change ourselves into a happier model of ourselves. The Morita School website claims this is called “contradictoriness of thinking," to think that we as people must always love ourselves and we must never have a negative thought, as if we are robots. Morita Therapy teaches us to thrive even in our darkest hours instead of wasting our time trying to have a fake smile on our face (Indigo Intentions.n.d)
- Closely related to Morita Therapy is Naikan Therapy. Naikan is about looking at ourselves and what is inside of us. How are we as a person? Do we lie, cheat and steel? Are we grateful for the little things we observe around us? Do we give thanks to the fact that our loved one just exists? Or do we take advantage of others? Do we feel that person is always going to be there so we treat them however we want? Ishin Yashimoto developed this as a tool to reflect on himself and he decided to share it with the world to help others (The Morita School.n.d).
How it can help with feelings of being unwanted,unloved, the need to be better looking,the need to be thinner or more muscular,the need to have a bigger penis,or perform better in bed:
- A great sentence from The Morita School website states it perfectly, "One problem is that as soon as we achieve a closer approximation to our ideas of perfection our mind is able to imagine how life could even be better. When we achieve that, the mind sets a new goal" We always strive to look better, be thinner, be more muscular, but it will never be enough. We will lose those ten pounds we wanted to lose and then want to lose 15 more (which is how EDs develop). We will never be good looking enough,our parts will never be "big" enough, we will never be the "best" in bed,etc. If you think you look disgusting in the mirror accept that you are having a negative thought about yourself and realize that it is a thought that is fine to have as that thought is your own. However, it is harmful and dangerous to try to diet, or go get plastic surgery as a quick way to fix things because you will never be thin enough, and that plastic surgery fix will just become more and more you want to change. "
(Found @ The Morita School - which has many videos and PDF/ Worksheets related to each technique. I will be putting up videos and pictures of myself using these.)
According to The Morita School, Naikan Therapy asks three simple questions, they are:"WHAT HAVE I RECEIVED?
WHAT HAVE I GIVEN? WHAT TROUBLES AND DIFFICULTIES HAVE I CAUSED?
More info/ Resources
- "Morita therapy is an ecological and purpose-centered, response oriented therapy created through case-based research by Shoma Morita, M.D. (1874-1938). Morita developed his theory of consciousness and medically-grounded four-stage progressive therapeutic method with as much rigor as his contemporaries, Sigmund Freud, Alfred Adler, Anna Freud, Carl Jung, Jacques Lacan, Melanie Klein, and Wilfred Bion." - Wikipedia
- Morita Therapy. (n.d.). Retrieved May 29, 2016, from http://www.todoinstitute.org/morita.html
- BASICS. (n.d.). Retrieved May 29, 2016, from http://www.moritaschool.com/read-me/
- Morita Therapy and the True Nature of Anxiety-Based Disorders: Shinkeishitsu by Shoma Morita - "The first English translation of a seminal work in a therapeutic practice that holds increasing interest for Westerners."Some of Morita's insights into the changeable nature of feelings and attention were ahead of his time. These insights fit well with some modern theories of how the dynamic brain works." -- Henry J. Kahn, University of California-San Francisco.This book presents the progressive nature of Morita therapy across four distinct stages: an isolation rest stage, a light monotonous work stage, a labor-intensive work stage, and the social integration stage....."
- Morita Therapy. (n.d.). Retrieved May 29, 2016, from http://indigointentions.com/morita-therapy.htm
- Healing with Morita therapy Page 1 @ Well Being
- Healing with Morita therapy - Wellbeing Magazine | WellBeing.com.au - “Pain and suffering will gradually subside if we allow them to follow their natural course. Emotions, when left on their own, will follow their own paths, erupt initially, climax and then lessen or altogether disappear. It has been observed that emotions intensify when the stimulus is continuous and the attention is over-focused. Emotions stay in a heightened state....
- The Four Skills of Japanese Psychology @ Thirty Thousand Days
- @Wikipedia - “Most therapies strive to reduce symptoms. Morita therapy, however, aims at building character to enable one to take action responsively in life regardless of symptoms, natural fears, and wishes.[5] Character is determined by behavior, by what one does. Dogmatic patterns of collapse are replaced with the flexibility to call upon courage and empowerment. Decisions become grounded in purpose rather than influenced by the fluid flow of feelings
ACCEPTANCE / Arugamama (COEXISTING WITH UNPLEASANT FEELINGS)
See DBT Therapy for acceptance tools and techniques
DE-FUSION (DISENTANGLING FROM YOUR THOUGHTS)
- Defusion - I'm noticing I'm having the thought... uploaded by Social Work & ACT - “Fusion is particularly unhelpful when it diminishes our ability to do the things that are important to us—those things we want our lives to be about. “
- "Defusion From Thoughts", Mindfulness Exercise With Naomi Goodlet uploaded by Naomi Goodlet
- Fusion and Defusion in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Mindfulness in ACT uploaded by Joseph Rhinewine - 3a // 3b
- Coping with Thoughts and Feelings using Defusion uploaded by Laura Green - “This video "Coping with Thoughts and Feelings using Defusion" teaches simple therapy tools for stepping back from uncomfortable thoughts and feelings. It utilises the Acceptance and Commitment Therapy technique, Defusion, which introduces a mindful way of responding to internal experiences.” - “
- “Leaves on a Stream” – Cognitive Defusion Exercise @ Mindfulness Muse - “(5) Allow the stream to flow at its own pace. Don’t try to speed it up and rush your thoughts along. You’re not trying to rush the leaves along or “get rid” of your thoughts. You are allowing them to come and go at their own pace.(6) If your mind says “This is dumb,” “I’m bored,” or “I’m not doing this right” place those thoughts on leaves, too, and let them pass. Pause 20 seconds.(7) If a leaf gets stuck, allow it to hang around until it’s ready to float by. If the thought comes up again, watch it float by another time. Pause 20 seconds.”
- Cognitive Defusion in a Nutshell @ Mindfulness Muse - “Harris (2009) explains that cognitive defusion means:Looking at thoughts rather than from thoughts.Noticing thoughts rather than becoming caught up in thoughts.Letting thoughts come and go rather than holding onto them.”
- Defusion Audio Files and Exercises @ Portland Psychotherapy Clinic - 1. Intro.2. Centering.3. Bodily Sensations.4. Emotions.5. Thoughts.6. Behaviors.7. Memories.8. Ending
- Part 1: You Are Not Your Thoughts: Cognitive Defusion to Change Your Mood @ Rowan Center for Behavioral Medicine - “1. Create distance from your thoughts. Try to preface problematic thoughts with, “I am having the thought that ….I am a loser.” 2. Repeat a troublesome thought out loud over and over until it loses its meaning. 3.Try singing your thoughts or saying them in funny voices. 4. Visualize a river with leaves floating along. Picture calmly placing each thought on a leaf and watch as it floats down the river. 5.Picture yourself as a mountain, with changing seasons, storms and all kinds of weather. The mountain remains rooted and grounded, unchanged by passing storms. You can be like the mountain and observe thoughts, feelings and sensations.”
- Defusing Techniques in ACT and CBT @ Get Self Help - Passengers on the Bus.The River.The Beach Ball.Thought train.The Tunnel.The Mountain.The Helicopter View The Poisoned Parrot The Mind Bully Flexible Thinking
- Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Part 2: Defusion @ MoodSurfing ™ - “Now, what I’d like you to do, is repeat the word “lemon” as fast as you can for 1 minute. Give it a try! Lemon, lemon, lemon, lemon….faster…say it louder! (Complete 60 seconds before moving on!) What did you notice? What happened to the word lemon? (Again, pause to reflect before moving on.) I wish I could hear your responses! Often what folks describe, is that the word becomes a bunch of jumbled, silly sounds. You maybe even found yourself laughing a bit. Or maybe the word stayed in tact, but lost it’s meaning and associations. What do you think will happen if you practice this exercise with the unhelpful, fused thoughts that are familiar to you and your mind (e.g., fat, incompetent, failure, etc?) When you have more time–now or later–I hope you’ll try this same exercise with a word/ thought that your mind tends to get hooked on, and just be curious and notice…what happens?”
- Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: Defusion uploaded by Veterans Health Administration
- Cognitive Defusion and Letting Go of Thoughts @ Greg Dorter Therapy Blog - “Steven Hayes, who developed Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), coined the term “cognitive fusion” to describe times when we are so tightly stuck to our thoughts, we become “fused” to them. When we’re experiencing cognitive fusion, we can’t separate ourselves from our thoughts. Our thoughts become our reality. We feel removed from the world outside of our thoughts, removed from our senses, from what we’re doing, and even from the people around us.The opposite of “cognitive fusion” is “cognitive defusion.” Cognitive defusion involves taking a step back from what’s going on in our minds, and detaching a little from our thoughts. In this state of defusion, we can observe our thoughts and other internal processes without getting lost in them, stuck in them or fused with them. We can simply notice our thoughts, watch them, accept them and let them go if we choose to.“
MINDFULNESS
See DBT , MBT & MBCT Therapy for tools and techniques
ATTENTION SKILLS
- The Four Skills of Japanese Psychology @ Thirty Thousand Days - “So instead of constantly focusing on our internal experience, we learn to shift our attention in a way that helps us engage with the world around us.”
- Morita Therapy @The ToDo Institute - “The more we pay attention to our symptoms (our anxiety, for example) the more we fall into this trap. When we are absorbed by what we are doing, we are not anxious because our attention is engaged by activity. But when we try to “understand” or “fix” or “work through” feelings and issues, our self-focus is heightened and exercised. This often leads to more suffering rather than relief. How can we be released from such self-focused attention?”
- Habits of Attention @ Thirty Thousand Days - “If we cultivate the habit of tuning in to the real-life-that-is-happening-this-very-moment show, and doing so with fierce attention and focus, we will defuse our anxiety, moment by moment, inch by inch. Rather than trying to do battle with anxiety head-on, we will, through our wholehearted connection with the world, nudge it out the back door. And as we redirect our attention from our anxiety to the cup of tea before us, or the sound of our feet on the pavement, or the feel of the book we are holding, we will develop new habits of attention that will serve us in countless ways.”
PERSPECTIVE TAKING
- @ Wikipedia - “Perspective-taking is the process by which an individual views a situation from another's point-of-view.Perspective-taking can occur visually in that one changes their physical location to see things as someone else does. Perspective-taking can also occur cognitively in that one mentally simulates the point-of-view of another’s cognitive state. For instance, one can visualize the viewpoint of a taller individual (physical state) or reflect upon another's point-of-view on a particular concept (cognitive state). In other words, perspective-taking is the process of temporarily suspending one’s own point-of-view in an attempt to view a situation as someone else might. “
- Perspective-Taking: A Tool for Building Stronger Relationships @ The Motion Machine - “Perspective of Self: This is how the problem is interpreted from your own experience, based on your own thoughts and feelings in that situation.Perspective of Other: This is how the problem is interpreted from the experience of the other person involved in the situation, based on their thoughts and feelings.Perspective of Third Party: This is how the problem is interpreted from someone who isn’t involved in the situation, but instead looking from a neutral, outside perspective (the “the fly on a wall” approach).”
- Developing social perspective (Perspective-taking, part 2) @ Engaging Peace -
- How to Teach Perspective-Taking to Children @ Speech And Language Kids - “Point out the emotions of others....Read books and talk about how the characters may be feeling in the book....Talk about your own emotions.”
- Activities for Kids on the Autism Spectrum @ the School Counseling Files - Perspective Drawings.Finish the Squiggle.Perspective Glasses.Back-to-Back Drawing.Headbandz.Read Interrupting Chicken.Friendship Bugs.Perspective Mapping
- The Six Essential Aspects of Empathy, Part 4: Perspective Taking by Karla McLaren - “In Perspective Taking, the point is not to ask yourself what you would do in the place of others; it’s to try and understand what they would do. “
- Perspective Taking @ Teaching Tolerance - Diversity, Equity and Justice
- !John Godfrey Saxe: The Blind Men and the Elephant
- Perspective Taking @ Socialthinking - “The Four Steps of Perspective Taking:Step 1: As soon as two people share a common space, they have a thought about each other. I have a thought about you; you have a thought about me.Step 2: I consider the other person's intentions and motives. If they seem suspicious, I will monitor the person more closely. The other person will also consider my intentions and motives. Step 3: Each person considers what the other may be thinking about them. Is it positive, negative, neutral? Is there history between us upon which we weigh these thoughts? Step 4: I monitor and possibly modify my behavior to keep the other person thinking about me the way I want them to think about me. They are doing the same for me.”
- Teaching Ideas for Perspective Taking Skills @ Jill Kuzma's SLP Social & Emotional Skill Sharing Site
- Superheroes Social Skills - Perspective Taking (Short Takes 3) uploaded by pacificnwpublish
- Classroom Activities on Perspective Taking @ Creducation - Learning Activities:Seeing Different Things in the Same Image.We Each See the World a Little Differently.Understanding Perception Differences
- Perspective Taking: Imagining How Another Feels Versus Imaging How You Would Fee @ Sage Pub - “Although often confused, imagining how another feels and imagining how you would feel are two distinct forms of perspective taking with different emotional consequences. The former evokes empathy; the latter, both empathy and distress. To test this claim, undergraduates listened to a (bogus) pilot radio interview with a young woman in serious need. One third were instructed to remain objective while listening; one third, to imagine how the young woman felt; and one third, to imagine how they would feel in her situation. The two imagine perspectives produced the predicted distinct pattern of emotions, suggesting different motivational consequences: Imagining how the other feels produced empathy, which has been found to evoke altruistic motivation; imagining how you would feel produced empathy, but it also produced personal distress, which has been found to evoke egoistic motivation.”
- Perspective Taking Skills @ Jill Kuzma's SLP Social & Emotional Skill Sharing SiteStage - I:Global Empathy– During 1st year of life, babies cannot distinguish between their own discomfort or that of another child, so they may cry when they hear another child crying.
- Stage II:Egocentric Empathy – Around age 1, children understand another person’s discomfort is not their own – may show great concern for the person who is crying.Stage III:Emotional Empathy – 2-3 years of age may identify the source of discomfort for another person-may offer to help or ask a question.Stage IV:Cognitive Empathy – By about age 6, a neurotypical child can see things from another’s perspective, so there is a noticeable increase in their efforts to provide comfort, support and to try to help and fix the problem.Stage V:Abstract Empathy – By ages 10-12, a child can extend sympathy beyond people they know to more global situations such as world hunger, war victims, homelessness, etc.”
Values
I feel like ACT therapy is a bit shamey and this is based on "values" in ACT therapy. Use this as Positive Psychlogy pushes our positive qualities and less like "you can only have these values if you get better, lose weight,etc." because that is what I feel this is aiming towards.
- Values Clarification Therapy, Values Clarification Therapist @ Good therapy - “Values can be influenced by:Family: In childhood, most people develop an internal reference for what is good or bad, important, or desirable and useful. This reference is often based on what parents or family members value.Individual experiences: Values are often transformed or adjusted based on life experiences, education, personal challenges, and successes.Religion and/or culture: These values tend to reflect a person's sense of right and wrong.Community: Values may be shared by many people who live together in a community.Political leaders: Overarching political values may have an influence on people regardless of religion, culture, upbringing, or life experience.“
- Values Worksheets @ Therapist Aid
- What are My Core Values? @ Counselling & Therapy Online - “Examples of core values: Authenticity. Friendship.Nature. Adventure.Family.Perfection. Achievement. Freedom. Power. Acceptance. Gratitude. Punctuality. Appreciation. Generosity . Perseverance. Accountability.Honesty. Purpose/meaning. Compassion. Health. RecognitionCommitment.Helping others. Respect. Competence.Humour . Status. Community.Independence Success. Connection to others. Intelligence.Spirituality /Religion. Career. Intimacy. Solitude Creativity. Integrity. Serenity/inner peace. Discipline. Joy. Security. Discovery. Justice. Trust. Education. Knowledge . Tolerance. Equality,Love. Variety. Faith. Loyalty. Wealthy. Fun. Leadership Wisdom
About/Info
- What is Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy? - "The Goal of Happiness:According to Albert Ellis and to REBT, the vast majority of us want to be happy. We want to be happy whether we are alone or with others; we want to get along with others—especially with one or two close friends; we want to be well informed and educated; we want a good job with good pay; and we want to enjoy our leisure time.Of course life doesn't always allow us to have what we want; our goal of being happy is often thwarted by the "slings and arrows of outrageous fortune." When our goals are blocked, we can respond in ways that are healthy and helpful, or we can react in ways that are unhealthy and unhelpful."
- basics-of-rebt.pdf
- Techniques of rebt @ slideShare
- Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy @ 3 Min Therapy - "EBT distinguishes clearly between two very different types of difficulties: practical problems and emotional problems. Your flawed behavior, unfair treatment by others, and undesirable situations, represent practical problems. Regrettably, your human tendency is to upset yourself about these practical problems, thereby unnecessarily creating a second order of problems--emotional suffering. " Also offers tons of online books, and resources about REBT
- An Introduction to Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy @ Counselling Resource - "In addition to the ABC framework, REBT also employs three primary insights:While external events are of undoubted influence, psychological disturbance is largely a matter of personal choice in the sense that individuals consciously or unconsciously select both rational beliefs and irrational beliefs at (B) when negative events occur at (A) Past history and present life conditions strongly affect the person, but they do not, in and of themselves, disturb the person; rather, it is the individual’s responses which disturb them, and it is again a matter of individual choice whether to maintain the philosophies at (B) which cause disturbance. Modifying the philosophies at (B) requires persistence and hard work, but it can be done."
- @ 3rd wave therapies - "REBT is a cognitive approach that would shift in process to use the power of persuasion, teaching methods and evidence gathering to assist clients in to understand and modify irrational behavior and beliefs and to learn self acceptance."
Apply
- REBT Self-Defeating Patterns Worksheet
- Albert Ellis - Substituting Rational Thinking for Irrational Thoughts - 1984 uploaded by Quest For Peace
- How to Deal with Difficult People (Albert Ellis , Ph. D) uploaded by hyntishs kanal
- REBT Worksheets and Handouts @ REBT Books
- REBT Handouts @ Dupage therapy (dot) com
- REBT Network - Worksheets, library,etc.
ABCDEF model
- ABC Worksheet (The ABCs of REBT)-therapy and counseling @ Stress group - "Use this Worksheet to Learn the ABCs of counseling (The ABC model of rational thinking, REBT, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy)"
- " A. (Activating event) Drunk people outside, making some noise. • B. (irrational Belief (iB) I have about A) They MUST NOT make any noise.• C. (Consequences of having those beliefs about A) When noisy drunk people pass in the street outside late at night and wake me up. I Feel angry. It feels bad. I lie awake feeling angry and upset and don't get back to sleep for a long time.• D. (Dispute the irrational Beliefs (iB’s) in B by turning them into questions and answers) WHY shouldn't they make any noise- where is that commandment written in stone? Where is the evidence? Again, who made you Supreme Ruler of the Universe dictating how people Should or Must act? • E. (Effective new thinking- substitute something rational instead of B) Drunk people are often noisy, but it's no BIG deal. I don’t like it, but I can damn deal with what I don’t like. Maybe I will touch base with them in the morning (when they are sober)" - ABCs of REBT @ Stress Group
- The 12 Irrational Beliefs (iB's) of REBT Examples of Irrational Belief Statements - 1. The idea that we MUST.2. The notion that certain acts are awful or evil, 3. The idea that it is horrible when things don't go the way we long for them to. 4. The idea that human misery is invariably externally caused and is forced on us by outside people and events.5. The idea that if something is or may be dangerous or fearsome we should be terribly upset and endlessly obsess about it. 6. The idea that it is easier to avoid.... 7. The idea that we absolutely need something other or stronger or greater than ourself on which to rely. 8. The idea that we should be thoroughly competent, intelligent, and achieving in all possible respects.9. The idea that because something once strongly affected our life, it should indefinitely affect it. 10. The idea that we must have certain and perfect control over things .11. The idea that human happiness can be achieved by inertia and inaction. 12. The idea that we have virtually no control over our emotions and that we cannot help feeling disturbed about things
- "Disputing is the D of the ABC model." - REBT Network
- REBT Disputing of Irrational Beliefs (DIBS) Form - "REBT teaches people to seek out and dispute their Irrational Beliefs. You can increase your rationality and reduce your irrational beliefs, by spending several minutes each day asking yourself the following questions and entering your answers in the text areas below. To get the best results, give careful thought to each question, and avoid relying on well-rehearsed answers. (The REBT Disputing of Irrational Beliefs [DIBS] Form can be used in conjunction with the REBT Self-Help Form).Once you have answered each of the questions, you can process the form to review your responses, and—if you wish —print your answers for future reference."
- 3 Ways to Dispute Irrational Beliefs - "Disputing Irrational Beliefs (DIBs) asks you to look for evidence. Evidence requires that you find an event that reflects your belief. You can sense something bad, something you do not like, but you cannot sense something that is awful. Awful is merely an idea or belief that you hold. You can sense a loss, but not a person who is a loser. To do the disputing exercise, get a blank sheet of paper and write at the top your Irrational Belief. Be sure to state it clearly and frankly.Next write the question, “Is there any evidence that my belief is true?” Then write your answer. Next, write, “What bad can happen to me if I keep that belief?” Then write your answer. Finally, write, “What good can happen to me if I keep my belief?”"
- Disputing Thoughts and Generating New Effective Philosophies By Helen Nieves - "he following questions can help you when disputing your thoughts.What self-defeating irrational belief do I want to dispute and surrender?Can I rationally support this belief? What evidence exists of the falseness of this belief? Does any evidence exist of the truth of this belief? What are the worst things that could actually happen to me if I don’t get what I think I must (or do get what I think I must not get)? What good things could I make happen if I don’t get what I think I must (or do get what I think I must not get)?
- Types of disputing by Rex @ REBT Info - "Dispute the belief – not the inference. Types of dispute & Styles of dispute
The Three Basic Musts
- @REBT network - I.I must do well and win the approval of others or else I am no good.II.Other people must do "the right thing" or else they are no good and deserve to be punished.III. Life must be easy, without discomfort or inconvenience.
"oughts"
Cognitive Techniques
Rational Analysis
Disputing
irration belief
Changing one's language
Reframing
Emotive Techniques
rational-emotive imagery
Role playing
Shame attacking exercise
Use of force and vigor
Behavioral Techniques
Exposure
Risk taking
Paradoxical behavior
Thought Field Therapy
Emotional Freedom Technique
Emotional Freedom Technique
Meridians
- Meridian Therapy @ Health Science
- The Main Energy Source of Human Body. The 12 meridians | Viscambio - "Most individuals cannot see ‘chi’ energy but they can feel it. When everything is going well we feel a sense of elation – that is ‘chi’ when everything continues to go wrong, despite our best efforts, that is also ‘chi’, but in this case negative chi. Unlike the veins that our blood flows through, meridians are throughout the entire body, but rather than fluid they deal more with energy and states of consciousness."
- Meridian Chart & Map Of Meridians / Meridian Points / Acupoints @ GoE
- The Guide To The 12 Major Meridians of the Body @ Healdove - "Meridians of the body are responsible for all the body’s major organ systems: endocrine, nervous, circulatory, immune, respiratory, skeletal, muscular, digestive and the lymphatic system. If the energy flowing through a meridian is imbalanced in any way the system it fuels is jeopardized and disease results."
- The Twelve Major Meridians of the Body @ Natural Wellness Girl - "Lung meridian.• Large intestine meridian• Spleen meridian• Stomach meridian• Heart meridian• Small intestine meridian• Bladder meridian• Kidney meridian• Pericardium (Circulation/Sex) meridian• Triple Warmer meridian• Liver meridian• Gallbladder meridian
- @Wikipedia - "The meridian system (simplified Chinese: 经络; traditional Chinese: 經絡; pinyin: jīngluò, also called channel network) is a traditional Chinese medicine (TCM) belief about a path through which the life-energy known as "qi" flows"
- Science Finally Proves Meridians Exist @ Uplift Connect
- What is Meridian System? @ shen-nong - "By connecting and uniting different parts of our body, meridians provide the transport service for the fundamental substances of qi, blood, and body fluids. The flow of qi in the Meridian System concentrates or "injects" in certain areas of the skin's surface. These areas are very small points, otherwise known as "acupuncture points".
- The Body Meridians - An Energy map @ Natural Health Zone - "Energy blockages can be the result of stress, an injury or trauma, or bad living habits (diet, habits/addictions, lack of exercise) and can be traced to the root of all health (physical/mental/spiritual) problems."
Tapping
- The Tapping Solution @ Youtube
- EFT Master Judy Byrne explains the tapping points uploaded by Judy Byrne
- What Is Tapping And How Can I Start Using It? @ The Tapping Solution - "The body, like everything in the universe, is composed of energy. Restore balance to the body’s energy, and you will mend the negative emotions and physical symptoms that stem from the energy disruption. Tapping restores the body’s energy balance, and negative emotions are conquered.....You may be wondering about these meridians. Put simply, energy circulates through your body along a specific network of channels. You can tap into this energy at any point along the system.This concept comes from the doctrines of traditional Chinese medicine, which referred to the body’s energy as “ch’i.” In ancient times, the Chinese discovered 100 meridian points. They also discovered that by stimulating these meridian points, they could heal. Call it energy, call it the Source, call it life force, call it ch’i… Whatever you want to call it, it works.
- The Chinese Medicine Meridian System @ Academy of Classical Oriental Sciences - "It is tempting to think of the meridians of the human body the same way as we think of the circulatory system, as the meridians are responsible for the distribution of the basic substances throughout the body just like the circulatory system, but here is where the similarities end. Conventional anatomy and physiology would not be able to identify these pathways in a physical sense in the way that blood vessels can be identified.It is more useful to consider the meridian system as an energetic distribution network that in itself tends towards energetic manifestation. Meridians can be best understood as a process rather than a structure.
Tapping Points
History of EFT & Tapping: Guide to The Tapping Techniques @ GoE - TFT - Thought Field Therapy // EFT - Emotional Freedom Techniques // Energy EFT // Positive EFT // Optimal EFT // Faster EFT // TBT - Trauma Busting Technique // SET - Simple Energy Techniques // Matrix Reimprinting // linical EFT
- Judy Byrne @ Youtube
- Thought Field Therapy Tapping Points uploaded by TFT Val
- Thought Field Therapy -- The Sequence @ trans 4 Mind
- History of EFT & Tapping: Guide to The Tapping Techniques @ GoE - TFT - Thought Field Therapy // EFT - Emotional Freedom Techniques // Energy EFT // Positive EFT // Optimal EFT // Faster EFT // TBT - Trauma Busting Technique // SET - Simple Energy Techniques // Matrix Reimprinting // Clinical EFT
- Mindfulness Muse (dot) com - site that has loads of techniques.
- 1000+ ideas about Acupressure Points Chart on Pinterest | Acupressure, Acupuncture Points and Acupuncture
- Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) How To Do EFT - Tapping Points Diagram #EFT Basic Recipe, Fear Release, Manifest Dreams | Mind / Body | Pinterest | Eft Tapp…
- eft-wall-chart | Eft Tapping and Charts @ Pintrest
- How to Tap: Emotional Freedom Technique Informational video uploaded by The Tapping Solution
The Tapping Solution - EFT Tapping Points Guide from Tap4Health
- EFT Tapping Points - Success for Spiritual Entrepreneurs
- Metta Center: EFT Tapping Points
- EFT Tapping Points @ Rainbow Crystal
- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgS8GKY3tcY
- EFT Tapping Points @ Janet Hilts
- EFT Tapping Charts @ TapIntoHeaven.com
- How To Do EFT - Tapping Points Diagram - EFT Basic Recipe @ EFT Alive
- Brad Yates' Youtube channel
- EFT Tapping Points - Shortcut Method
- How to do the EFT Tapping Basics - The Basic Recipe The Basic Tapping Procedure - The Centerpiece of EFT
- EFT Tapping Points @ The Energy Therapy Centre
About/ Info
- What is Mentalization Based Therapy? - ""Mentalization based therapy (MBT) is a specific type of psychodynamically-oriented psychotherapy designed to help people with borderline personality disorder (BPD). Its focus is helping people to differentiate and separate out their own thoughts and feelings from those around them.People with borderline personality disorder tend to have unstable and intense relationships, and may unconsciously exploit and manipulate others. They may find it difficult or impossible to recognize the effects their behavior has on other people, to put themselves in other people’s shoes and to empathize with others."
- Mentalization based treamtnet @ Wikipedia - "Mentalization-based treatment (MBT) is a form of psychodynamic psychotherapy, developed and manualised by Peter Fonagy and Anthony Bateman. MBT was designed for individuals with borderline personality disorder (BPD), who suffer from disorganised attachment and allegedly failed to develop a mentalization capacity within the context of an attachment relationship. Fonagy and Bateman claim mentalization is the process by which we implicitly and explicitly interpret the actions of oneself and others as meaningful on the basis of intentional mental states. The object of treatment is that BPD patients increase mentalization capacity which should improve affect regulation and interpersonal relationships.The treatment should be distinguished from and has no connection with the more common Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) therapy developed by Jon Kabat-Zinn.More recently, a range of Mentalization-Based treatments, using the "mentalizing stance" defined in MBT but directed at children (MBT-C), families (MBT-F) and adolescents (MBT-A, and for chaotic multi-problem youth, AMBIT (Adolescent Mentalization-Based Integrative Treatment)) has been under development by groups mainly gravitating around the Anna Freud Centre""
- How Mentalization-Based Therapy Works to Treat BPD @ Borderline Personality Treatment - "Research by Bateman and Fonagy found that people who received BPD treatment using Mentalization-Based Therapy were emotionally better than those who opted for standard treatment. Patients who had undergone an intensive MBT program showed reduced levels of deliberate self-harm, suicide attempts, anxiety, and depression, and were functioning better socially."
- Mentalization Techniques uploaded by by ElsGlobalMedicalNews - "Dr. Patrick Luyten discusses how clinicians can use mentalization techniques to help psychotherapy patients who have a history of trauma. GMNN's Heidi Splete reports."
- @ Treating BPD (dot) ca
- Be Mindful Online - "Everyone's talking about mindfulness. Follow this online course and experience for yourself the life changing results that the practice of mindfulness brings.If you really want to change your life and open up opportunities, learning to practice mindfulness is one of the most dramatically effective things you can do.Practising mindfulness is a mind-body approach to life that helps us to relate differently to experiences. It involves paying attention to our thoughts and feelings in a way that increases our ability to manage difficult situations and make wise choices.It's free to start the course and it's easy-to-follow with step-by-step guidance throughout. In as little as 4 weeks you'll be rewarded with mindfulness skills that'll last a life-time! "
- Mentalization and attachment the implication for community based therapies - great info about how to mentalize
- What is Mentalizing & Why Do It with Jon G. Allen, PhD uploaded by The Menninger Clinic - "Jon G. Allen, PhD, senior staff psychologist at The Menninger Clinic, talks with Janice Poplack, LCSW, director of Social Work, about mentalizing and the role it plays in attachment relationships."
- Mentalizing and MBT uploaded by Espen Jan Folmo - "A movie about Mentalization-based treatment (MBT) featuring Anthony Bateman and Espen Folmo. MBT is a form of psychodynamic psychotherapy, developed and manualised by Peter Fonagy, Anthony Bateman and Sigmund Karterud. MBT was designed for individuals with borderline personality disorder (BPD), who suffer from disorganised attachment and allegedly failed to develop a mentalization capacity within the context of an attachment relationship. MBT is an evidence based treatment for Borderline Personality Disorder. Movie produced by Institutt for Mentalisering (https://www.mentalisering.no) and MBT Kvalitetslaboratorium (https://www.mbt-lab.no)."
- Mentalization Based Treatment Training Video with Anthony Bateman - Equivalence uploaded by The Anna Freud Centre - "Psychic equivalence is a non-mentalizing mode. It must be addressed in treatment when it arises but can be difficult to shift. The issue is not what the patient believes but how he holds the belief and experience. Do not challenge the content. In this clip the patient is talking about her experience of a court usher, the person who runs the court process, and is sure that the people in the court room are trying to ‘wind her up’.In this video Anthony Bateman demonstrates the importance of initially accepting psychic equivalence and the need to question gently and continuously psychic equivalence as much as possible. For a full commentary of this training video, please visit: MBT Training Resources - http://annafreud.org/training-researc..."
- Mentalization Based Treatment Training video with Anthony Bateman - Empathic Validation 1 uploaded by The Anna Freud Centre - "In this video Anthony Bateman demonstrates empathic validation at the beginning of a session with a patient.Empathic validation with the patient’s current state of mind is the initial stance of the MBT clinician at the beginning of every session. This requires the clinician to identify the basic or primary emotion and to demonstrate that he or she sees things from the patient perspective. This stabilizes the patient’s sense of self and reduces anxiety. If possible the clinician also needs to show that he understands the effect that the problem is having on the patient. In this case this is only partially achieved. For a full commentary of this training video, please visit: MBT Training Resources - http://annafreud.org/training-researc..."
- Mentalization based treatment for borderline personality disorder - "Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a complex and serious mental disorder characterized by a pervasive pattern of difficulties with emotion regulation and impulse control, and instability both in relationships and in selfimage 1. It represents a serious public health problem, because it is associated with suicide attempts and self harm, both of which are consistent targets of mental health services. Recurrent suicidal behaviour is reported in 69-80% of patients with BPD, and suicide rates are estimated to be up to 10% 2."
- Peter Fonagy, Anna Freud Centre Chief Executive: What is Mentalization? interview uploaded by The Anna Freud Centre - "Mentalizing refers to our ability to attend to mental states in ourselves and in others as we attempt to understand our own actions and those of others on the basis of intentional mental states. A focus on this very human activity as a therapeutic intervention forms the core of mentalization based treatment (MBT). MBT was initially developed for the treatment of borderline personality disorder (BPD) although it is now being used on a wide range of disorders."
- Mentalization-Based Treatment (MBT) For Personality Disorders @ Mental Help (dot) net - "1) Mentalization enables us to understand our own contributions to problems and conflicts with others; 2) Mentalization helps us to change our behaviors and calm down when we are upset; 3) Mentalization allows us to relate to ourselves and other people with empathy and compassion; and 4) Mentalization promotes our ability to effectively cope with conflict."
How to mentalize
- Mentalization Based Treatment Part 1 // Part 2 uploaded by The Red Devil Podcast - "I Read out word for word everything about MBT-I & MBT Video's are lengthy but informative this is MBT in FULL"
- Anthony Bateman mentalising role play uploaded by Star Wards Channel - "Video of Prof Anthony Bateman demonstrating mentalising through a role play of an (accelerated, 10 minute!) therapy session"
About/Info
- "Naikan (Japanese: 内観, lit. “inside looking” or “introspection”) is a structured method of self-reflection developed by Yoshimoto Ishin (1916–1988) a businessman and devout Jodo Shinshu Buddhist who, as a young man, had engaged in an ascetic 'contrition' (mishirabe) practice involving sensory deprivation through dwelling in a dark cave without food, water or sleep. Wishing to make such introspection available to others he developed Naikan as a less difficult method which he first introduced to young people who had been incarcerated for committing crime and social disturbances. Later the practice was introduced to the general public. Naikan practitioners claim that Naikan helps people understand themselves and their relationships. Naikan practice is based on three questions: What have I received from (person x)? What have I given to (person x)? What troubles and difficulties have I caused to (person x)? A related fourth question, "What troubles and difficulties has (person x) caused me", is purposely ignored in Naikan." - Wikipedia
- The Beautiful Trap @ Tricycle - "It is a gracefully simple practice of reflection on your personal relationships—to your mother, father, siblings, lovers, friends—focused on three pointed questions: What have I received from that person? What have I given that person? What troubles have I caused that person "
- Naikan Tor zum Selbst uploaded by Franz Ritter
- Part 6 Gratitude and "Naikan" by Patricia Ryan Madson - "Patricia describes her experience with NAIKAN, a Japanese meditation form that emphasizes looking at Reality with new eyes. We are all receiving from others, but rarely do we really notice these things. Naikan allows us to take stock of these gifts."
- BUDDHISM 101 Week 10 Naikan method..mp4 - YouTube - ""Nai" means within and "kan" means "looking" so this is the " Method of Looking Within or the "Method of Introspection.""
- Conquering Your Stress Podcast # 16 Naikan Self Reflection @ YouTube
- Naikan -- reconnection to ourselves | Johanna Schuh | TEDxLinz @YouTube - "This talk was given at a local TEDx event, produced independently of the TED Conferences. Johanna Schuh emphasizes the need to pause for a moment and put the right questions, in this case the three questions of Naikan. Move the pressure from seeing the problems with others and the bad things they've done to you, to a self-reflection to explore one's inner self by focusing on the good things, feelings exchanged between you and them and accepting the troubles you caused them."
- Buddhism101: Naikan Method @ YouTube - "Naikan method is the "Method of Looking Within" or the "Method of Introspection" by Ven. Thich Hue Hai
SHOW MORE" - How to Practice Naikan Reflection @ The ToDo Institute - "In examining our relationship with another we begin by looking at what we have received from that person."
- Naikan: A form of Japanese psychotherapy -- meditative self-help @ Examiner.com - " During meditation you reflect on your life from the day you were born until the present day focusing on a significant person in your life, and what you gave to and took from them"
- Naikan Self-Reflection from Japan: Question #1 on Vimeo - "Naikan is a method of self-reflection that originated in Japan. In this video, author Gregg Krech introduces the the questions which make up the foundation of Naikan reflection and then discusses the first question in more detail. Naikan is used as a method of psychotherapy in Japan, but its roots are in Eastern Philosophy and Buddhism."
- Naikan Therapy @ Tom Moon - "It's sad how many relationships, which begin with such love and promise, devolve into mutual rancor and resentment. When this happens is there something faulty in our basic expectations in relationships? When we resent other people for not living up to our expectations, aren't we essentially acting on the assumption that we deserve to have whatever we want? That's not an uncommon attitude – but it's hardly a mature perspective, and it's a guaranteed setup for constant emotional turmoil, because it's a safe bet that other people don't believe that it's their duty to fulfill our expectations. What's more likely to bring happiness and contentment in your life – to spend your time trying to make sure you get what you deserve, or to live with the intention of acting from gratitude toward the people around you?"
- 3-Step Daily Naikan Meditation for Gratitude How to Meditate @ Yoga Journal
- Japanese Self-Reflection: Naikan @ Psych Central - "It spans “the roots of stuff” to “attention to what’s not there” to contemplation on whether we are giving grief or gratitude to others, and much more. One chapter is fascinatingly called Relationships as a Vehicle for Training. Segments of chapters are artfully interposed, only very occasionally, with a quote or poem or apropos reflection from others. Some are by monks; others quite unexpected (“Must I hold a candle to my shames?” — Jessica, in The Merchant of Venice)."
- Naikan: Gratitude, Grace, and the Japanese Art of Self-Reflection by Gregg Krech - "Drawing on Eastern tradition, Naikan ("nye-kahn") is a structured method for intensely meditating on our lives, our interconnections, our missteps. Through Naikan we develop a natural and profound sense of gratitude for blessings bestowed on us by others, blessings that were always there but went unnoticed. This collection of introductory essays, parables, and inspirations explains what Naikan is and how it can be applied to life and celebrations throughout the year."
- "Naikan is a Japanese word which means “inside looking” or “introspection”. A more poetic translation is “seeing oneself with the mind’s eye”. It is a structured method of self-reflectionthat helps us to understand ourselves, our relationships and the fundamental nature of human existence. Naikan was developed by Yoshimoto Ishin, a devout Buddhist of the Jodo Shinshu sect in Japan. His strong religious spirit led him to practice mishirabe, an arduous and difficult method of meditation. Wishing to make such introspection available to others, he developed Naikan as a method that could be more widely practiced." - Naikan: A Method of Self-reflection -- The ToDo Institute
Meditations
- Naikan meditation by Venerable Zhi Sheng uploaded by Camiel van Velthoven - "Naikan meditation by Venerable Zhi Sheng"
About/Info
- Overcoming Depersonalization Disorder: A Mindfulness and Acceptance Guide to Conquering Feelings of Numbness and Unreality by Fugen Neziroglu
- Jon Kabat-Zinn/Mindful Meditation - ""Jon Kabat-Zinn (born Kabat on June 5, 1944) is Professor of Medicine Emeritus and creator of the Stress Reduction Clinic and the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Health Care, and Society at the University of Massachusetts Medical School.Kabat-Zinn was a student of Zen Master Seung Sahn and a founding member of Cambridge Zen Center. His practice of yoga and studies with Buddhist teachers led him to integrate their teachings with those of Western science. He teaches mindfulness which he claims can help people cope with stress, anxiety, pain and illness. The stress reduction program created by Kabat-Zinn, called Mindfulness-based stress reduction, is offered at medical centers, hospitals, and health maintenance organizations""
- Mindfulness-Based Treatment Approaches: Clinician's Guide to Evidence Base and Applications - "Eastern spiritual traditions have long maintained that mindfulness meditation can improve well-being. More recently, mindfulness-based treatment approaches have been successfully utilized to treat anxiety, depressive relapse, eating disorders, psychosis, and borderline personality disorder. This book discusses the conceptual foundation, implementation, and evidence base for the four best-researched mindfulness treatments: mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR), mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT)."
- Mindfulness: A practical guide to finding peace in a frantic world by Danny Penman and J. Mark G. Williams - "The
book is based on Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT). MBCT revolves around a straightforward form of mindfulness meditation which takes just a few minutes a day for the full benefits to be revealed. MBCT has been clinically proven to be at least as effective as drugs for depression and is widely recommended by US physicians and the UK's
National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence - in other words,it works. More importantly it also works for people who are not depressed but who are struggling to keep up with the constant demands of the modern world." - HeadSpace (dot)com - "Headspace is meditation made simple. Learn online, when you want, wherever you are, in just 10 minutes a day."
- Mindfulness Muse (dot) com - site that has loads of techniques.
- "Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT) is a psychological therapy designed to aid in preventing the relapse of depression, specifically in individuals with Major depressive disorder (MDD). It uses traditional Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) methods and adds in newer psychological strategies such as mindfulness and mindfulness meditation. Cognitive methods can include educating the participant about depression.Mindfulness and mindfulness meditation, focus on becoming aware of all incoming thoughts and feelings and accepting them, but not attaching or reacting to them. Like CBT, MBCT functions on the theory that when individuals who have historically had depression become distressed, they return to automatic cognitive processes that can trigger a depressive episode. The goal of MBCT is to interrupt these automatic processes and teach the participants to focus less on reacting to incoming stimuli, and instead accepting and observing them without judgment.This mindfulness practice allows the participant to notice when automatic processes are occurring and to alter their reaction to be more of a reflection." - Wikipedia
- Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy: theory and practice. @ PubMed -"Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT) incorporates elements of cognitive-behavioural therapy with mindfulness-based stress reduction into an 8-session group program. Initially conceived as an intervention for relapse prevention in people with recurrent depression, it has since been applied to various psychiatric conditions. Our paper aims to briefly describe MBCT and its putative mechanisms of action, and to review the current findings about the use of MBCT in people with mood and anxiety disorders. The therapeutic stance of MBCT focuses on encouraging patients to adopt a new way of being and relating to their thoughts and feelings, while placing little emphasis on altering or challenging specific cognitions. Preliminary functional neuroimaging studies are consistent with an account of mindfulness improving emotional regulation by enhancing cortical regulation of limbic circuits and attentional control. Research findings from several randomized controlled trials suggest that MBCT is a useful intervention for relapse prevention in patients with recurrent depression, with efficacy that may be similar to maintenance antidepressants. Preliminary studies indicate MBCT also shows promise in the treatment of active depression, including treatment-resistant depression. Pilot studies have also evaluated MBCT in bipolar disorder and anxiety disorders. Patient and clinician resources for further information on mindfulness and MBCT are provided."
- @Centre for Mindfulness Studies - "We offer effective evidence-based clinical therapies for individuals with mental health concerns and chronic illnesses (including: anxiety, stress, depression, ADHD, insomnia, eating disorders, substance abuse and addiction)."
- @CBT Denver - "Zinn defines mindfulness as “paying attention in a particular way, on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally.” This nonjudgmental awareness allows people to perceive and experience certain thoughts, emotions, and physical symptoms while retaining a degree of separation from them. The key is to enter “being mode” when negative thoughts, feelings, and related symptoms occur, rather than letting them trigger “doing mode.” In being mode, negative thoughts, feelings, and physical symptoms can be experienced and defused, whereas in doing mode they would trigger actions with negative consequences."
- Applying Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy to Treatment of Depression @ Staroversky - "To cope with negative popping throughs, you can use meditation to train yourself to become aware of your wondering thoughts and bring back your attention to the present moment. People who are depressed, often have lots of negative popping thoughts about their past. A combination of mindfulness based stress reduction and cognitive therapy has been shown to be very effective for treatment of depression."
- @Psychology tools - worksheets , audio,etc.
- @OCDLA - "There is also a behavioral therapy component to mindfulness, which can be simply described as this: when faced with unwanted thoughts, feelings, sensations, and urges, it is best to make no effort whatsoever to avoid or control them. With mindfulness, the goal is to accept the presence of these unwanted experiences, and to act in a manner that is appropriate to the situation and in keeping with what we would actually like to do, rather than acting with the simple goal of short-term reduction of discomfort."
- Applying Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy to Treatment uploaded by University of California Television (UCTV) - "(Visit: http://www.uctv.tv/) Dr. Stuart Eisendrath, Professor of Clinical Psychiatry and Director of the UCSF Depression Center, explores alternatives to treating depression that include cognitive therapy and cognitive mindfulness-based therapy, a new technique that blends mindfulness meditation and cognitive therapy techniques to lessen depression, particularly in individuals with recurrent episodes. Series: "UCSF Osher Mini Medical School for the Public" [6/2012] [Health and Medicine] [Show ID: 23799]"
- Be Mindful Online - "Everyone's talking about mindfulness. Follow this online course and experience for yourself the life changing results that the practice of mindfulness brings.If you really want to change your life and open up opportunities, learning to practice mindfulness is one of the most dramatically effective things you can do.Practising mindfulness is a mind-body approach to life that helps us to relate differently to experiences. It involves paying attention to our thoughts and feelings in a way that increases our ability to manage difficult situations and make wise choices.It's free to start the course and it's easy-to-follow with step-by-step guidance throughout. In as little as 4 weeks you'll be rewarded with mindfulness skills that'll last a life-time! "
Raisin exercise
- Raisin Exercise: Mindfulness Meditation Practice, MBCT Raisin Exercise uploaded by Dr Hagen Rampes - "This is a classic mindfulness exercise that is carried out in mindfulness based stress reduction (MBSR) and mindfulness based cognitive therapy (MBCT) and other mindfulness courses. Acknowledgment to Jon Kabat Zinn. One can use any edible item, it does not have to be a raisin!This exercise is about stepping out of automatic pilot and slowing down and noticing our experiences in the present moment. This exercise can help us to enjoy our food and by mindfully eating, we are less likely to overeat. Dr Hagen Rampes http://www.mindfulnesslife.co.uk"
Body Scan
- Jon Kabat-Zinn: Body Scan - "Guided Meditation with Jon Kabat-Zinn. The Body Scan. From The Mindful Way through Depression (2007)
SHOW MORE" - @Living Well - "Usually, our response to bodily pain or discomfort is to distract ourselves or to try and numb the pain. In this exercise you will accept and notice with gentle curiosity your body in its comfort and discomfort."
- Script @ Mindfulness for Students - "1. Firstly checking in with your body just as it is right now noticing the sensations that are present, feeling the contact the body is making with the floor.2. Then starting to scan the body, sweeping your awareness through different parts of the body, without judging what you are aware of but as best you can bringing attention to your experience moment to moment."
- another script @ Inner Health Studio
- About & video for body scan exercise @ Mindful - "The body scan alternates between a wide and narrow focus of attention; from focusing on your little toe all the way through the entire body. The body scan trains your mind to be able to move from detailed attention to a wider and more spacious awareness from one moment to the next."
- UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center - "For an introduction to mindfulness meditation that you can practice on your own, turn on your speakers and click on the "Play" button. Podcasts are also available on iTunes. Download iTunes "
- Mindfulness Meditation Body Scan 15 minutes uploaded by Lara Patriquin - "This is a mindfulness meditation body scan. This is a great place to start your meditation practice. It is also a good exercise if you feel your thoughts are spinning or if you are having trouble sleeping. For more information on the benefits of meditation, go to trainyourbrainmeditation.com email me, Lara Patriquin, at [email protected]."
- A Brief MBSR Body Scan Exercise uploaded by toddandkristin - "A role play video showing a brief Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) Body Scan Exercise"
- Meditation Exercise- Body Scan uploaded by VaughanChiropractic
Body Awareness / proprioception
- Body Awareness Physical Therapy - "The name Body Awareness Physical Therapy represents our intention for your experience in physical therapy. We believe that by helping you to increase that awareness of your own body (where it is and how it moves in space) through education, hands on treatment, and exercises designed specifically for you, you will be able to achieve your maximum personal health."
- Sensing your own body is more complicated than you realize - "For the most part, proprioception works because of muscle spindles (below), a kind of sensory receptor within muscles. Research in the 1960s and 1970s found that muscle spindles detect the changes in length and velocity of a muscle, and then transmit that information to the central nervous system via sensory neurons. The changes detected by the muscle spindles also signal the angle of related joints, though joints have receptors that may contribute some information about limb positions. Additionally, the skin has stretch receptors, or mechanoreceptors, that can detect small movements of the limbs."
- Body Awareness for Kids | LIVESTRONG.COM - "Body awareness provides children with a perception of the dimensions of their bodies -- the shapes their bodies can make and spaces into which they can fit, what movements their bodies can accomplish and what their body parts actually are. Body awareness relies on tactile and vestibular position senses. There are several exercises children can do to help improve body awareness."
- Mind Body Awareness Project | Just another WordPress site
- Ages & Stages: All About Body Awareness | Scholastic.com - "Young infants visually discover their bodies when they first notice their hands. When a baby can hold objects, he has reached a milestone in his ability to understand spatial relationships. For example, 6-month-old Jason holds a rattle and intently examines it. He shakes it, looks at it, shakes it again, and then brings it to his mouth. Proprioception-the sense of die position and movement of his own body-helps him control his movements. There are nerve endings in the joints and muscles in his fingers, wrist, and arm that send signals to his brain. His brain then sends signals back to his body, prompting further coordination of his vision, muscle control, and movement planning. Thousands of firing neurons in his central nervous system enable him to achieve his desired goal: to explore that interesting object with his mouth.
- Movement and Body Awareness - FamilyEducation.com - "When you close your eyes, how do you know where your feet are? Your arms? Your hands? Proprioception is the internal sense that tells you where your body parts are without your having to look at them. This internal body awareness relies on receptors in your joints, muscles, ligaments, and connective tissue. They pick up information as muscles bend and stretch as well as when your body is still. The joints, muscles, and connective tissue in your buttocks, hips, and legs are compressed (pushed together) as you sit and read this. They are "distracted" (pulled apart) when you hang from a chin-up bar."
Introspective
- The Introspective Personality @ 16Personalities - "Introspection, an act of self-awareness that involves thinking about and analyzing your own thoughts and behavior..."
- Introspection @ Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy
- @ Wikipedia - "Introspection generally provides a privileged access to our own mental states,[2] not mediated by other sources of knowledge, so that individual experience of the mind is unique. Introspection can determine any number of mental states including: sensory, bodily, cognitive, emotional and so forth.Introspection has been a subject of philosophical discussion for thousands of years. The philosopher Plato asked, "…why should we not calmly and patiently review our own thoughts, and thoroughly examine and see what these appearances in us really are?" While introspection is applicable to many facets of philosophical thought it is perhaps best known for its role in epistemology, in this context introspection is often compared with perception, reason, memory, and testimony as a source of knowledge."
- @ Vocabulary - "Consider that intro means "within," while spec is from the Latin for "look." So you can tell that the word means the act of "looking within." Introspection isn't "thinking about yourself" in the sense of calculating your own interests; it's more like searching inside in order to understand yourself — what some people mock as "navel gazing."
- Conscious Self-Awareness & Spiritual Growth @ Dreamcatcher Reality - "We fail at introspection because it’s hard to control our flow of thought and to master the brain. Two primary causes include:Our education system and society offer us methods of critical evaluation of things outside of us. Hence, we readily judge and analyze people and environments around us without analyzing and reflecting on our own thought process and behavior.Our culture of consumption (i.e. consumerism) has made us more open to external, readily consumable forms of content (visual and aural) instead of being introspective of the content that we, ourselves, are creating."
- Introspection @ The Book of Life
- Introspection (Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy)
- @Very Well - "In Wundt's lab, highly trained observers were presented with carefully controlled sensory events. These individuals were then asked to describe their mental experiences of these events. Wundt believed that the observers needed to be in a state of high attention to the stimulus and in control of the situation."
About/Info
Distress tolerance will help you cope better with painful events by building up your resiliency and giving you new ways to soften the effects of upsetting circumstances. ...Distraction skills are important because (1) they can temporarily stop you from thinking about your pain and, as a result, (2) they give you time to find an appropriate coping response...Distraction can help you let go of the pain by helping you think about something else.
Mindfulness will help you experience more fully the present moment while focusing less on painful experiences from the past or frightening possibilities in the future. Mindfulness will also give you tools to overcome habitual, negative judgments about yourself and others. Emotion regulation skills help you to recognize more clearly what you feel and then to observe each emotion without getting overwhelmed by it. The goal is to modulate your feelings without behaving in reactive, destructive ways. Interpersonal effectiveness gives you new tools to express your beliefs and needs, set limits, and negotiate solutions to pro..." - The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook by Matthew McKay, Jeffrey Wood, Jeffrey Brantley
"The word dialectic (in dialectical behavior therapy) means to balance and compare two things that appear very different or even contradictory. In dialectical behavior therapy, the balance is between change and acceptance (Linehan, 1993a). You need to change the behaviors in your life that are creating more suffering for yourself and others while simultaneously also accepting yourself the way you are." - The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook by Matthew McKay, Jeffrey Wood, Jeffrey Brantley
Mindfulness will help you experience more fully the present moment while focusing less on painful experiences from the past or frightening possibilities in the future. Mindfulness will also give you tools to overcome habitual, negative judgments about yourself and others. Emotion regulation skills help you to recognize more clearly what you feel and then to observe each emotion without getting overwhelmed by it. The goal is to modulate your feelings without behaving in reactive, destructive ways. Interpersonal effectiveness gives you new tools to express your beliefs and needs, set limits, and negotiate solutions to pro..." - The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook by Matthew McKay, Jeffrey Wood, Jeffrey Brantley
"The word dialectic (in dialectical behavior therapy) means to balance and compare two things that appear very different or even contradictory. In dialectical behavior therapy, the balance is between change and acceptance (Linehan, 1993a). You need to change the behaviors in your life that are creating more suffering for yourself and others while simultaneously also accepting yourself the way you are." - The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook by Matthew McKay, Jeffrey Wood, Jeffrey Brantley
Understanding Your Loved One with Debbie Corso and Amanda Smith, LMSW - class. You will have to pay and sign up for it.
- Mindfulness Handout 4a: Ideas for Practicing Observing
- The Emotionally Sensitive Person by Karyn Hall, PhD @ Psychology Toda
- The Emotionally Sensitive Person: Finding Peace When Your Emotions Overwhelm You: Karyn D. Hall PhD - "In The Emotionally Sensitive Person, a psychologist provides proven-effective cognitive behavioral and mindfulness techniques to help people like you who struggle with intense emotions. In the book, you will learn powerful tools for staying in the present moment, identifying emotional triggers, developing a strong and healthy identity, and experiencing overwhelming or uncomfortable emotions without becoming upset"
- Emotional First Aid @ Healing Refuge
- DBT Coping Skills @ Sirius Project
- Who is Matthew McKay , PhD
- Cognitive Restructuring
- How to cope with intense emotions using escape vs tolerate methods
- BrokenBrain Podcast's youtube channel
- @3rd Wave Therapies
- Creating Magical Relationships from AngelStarCreations
- Mindfulness Muse (dot) com - site that has loads of techniques.
- Mood-Dependent Behavior vs. Strategic Behavior @ Mindfulness Muse
- Alan Watts ~ The Addiction To Control
- CBT Relaxation Exercises by Freshershealth
- Download the Confidence Coach app
- Centre For clinical interventions/ CFCI's numerous worksheets and workbooks for self help and love
- Check out Excel At Life/ CBT app
- GetHelp's 7-step Self Help Course & guided self-help package
- GetHelp (dot)co(dot)uk's Self Help Course
- Check out Cyquest
- Check out GetSelfHelp (dot)co (dot) uk for awesome helpful worksheets,etc
- CBT for ADHD - Manage Adult ADHD with Leading Edge Group Therapy
- Key Concepts To Dealing With Emotions by Dan Beaver
- Dan Beaver, MFT's channel
- Cognitive Restructuring
- Self-help for BPD: Learning to control impulsivity and tolerate distress @ HElpGuide
- Check out GetSelfHelp (dot)co (dot) uk for awesome helpful worksheets,etc
- **DBT Self Help (dot) com
- Coping skills chart from PDAN
- Loving Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder: A Model of Emotion Regulation
- Kundalini Yoga Meditation to Not Feel Abandoned
- Check out koRnrebel29's Youtube Channel
- DBT handbook from BiPolarsjuk
- Dialectal Behavior Therapy by Matthew McKay
- Get Self Help:Wheel of Emotions
- What is the grounding technique?
- Use the Feeling Faces cards to help you with your emotions
- DBT Game by Dr. Moonshine
- Embracing Borderline Personality Disorder - Dr Keith Gaynor
- Faded Borders:Combining DBT and meditation
- DBT Peer Connections Skills Training Video Series
- DBT Challenge Daily Diary by Atypical Aeshe
- Concentration:Be here now
- ILoveDBT (dot)com
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skill Handbook - Fulton State Hospital 2004
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy: Volume 2 - Companion Worksheets
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) with Marsha Linehan Video
- Scriptures for Dbt
- Top 10 DBT Skills for Overcoming Alexithymia & Depression
- Random DBT Sheets #1
- Random DBT Sheets #2
- DBT Secondary Behavior Treatment Targets - Handouts & Worksheets
Radical acceptance
Cognitive reappraisal
Self-regulation
- Emotional self-regulation - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
- SELF REGULATION VIDEO 1 - YouTube
- TEDxYMCAAcademy- Dr. Stuart Shanker- Self Regulation and Learning - YouTube
- Trauma Module 6: Self-Regulation - YouTube
- Self-Regulation: The Second Core Strength
- 8 Ways to Improve Self-Regulation - Career Skills From MindTools.com
- Self-Regulation | Psychology Today
Grounding
- What is the grounding technique?
- Grounding Techniques @ Fortrefuge - Check in with your body.Talk to yourself.Change the scenery.List 5 differences between then and now.Keep your hands busy.Look around and count the things you like.Hug something.Play a trivia game with yourself.Practice a tongue twister.
- Grounding Techniques - Mental Illness Mouse - "Grounding skills occur within two specific approaches:1) Sensory Awareness. 2) Cognitive Awareness"
- Grounding Me @ DBT Peer Connections
- Mindfulness and DBT: “What” Skills @ Dr. Kathleen Young: Treating Trauma in Tucson - 1. Observe.2. Describe.3. Participate
- Grounding Exercises for Borderline Personality Disorder @ Very Well - Visual and Auditory Grounding Exercises. Tactile Grounding Exercises.Other Grounding Exercises
- Grounding techinques @ Benzo Buddies
- Easy Grounding Exercises to Calm the Nervous System — Dr. Stephanie Cordes, ND - "PROCEDURE: 1 Describe 5 things you see in the room.2.Name 4 things you can feel (“my feet on the floor” or “the air in my nose”) 3.Name 3 things you hear right now (“traffic outside”) 4.Name 2 things you can smell right now (or 2 smells you like) 5. Name 1 good things about yourself"
- 5-4-3-2-1 COPING TECHNIQUE by By: Jordan Killebrew @ therapistsb
- The 5-4-3-2-1 game is based on the senses @ My PTSD - "Visually, focus on the color of objects in your immediate environment (“it’s green,” “long and sharp” etc.) Keep your eyes open, and take note of where you are. Look for 5 colors in your immediate environment.Auditory, do focus on identifying the various sounds you’re hearing at the present time.Tactilely, do touch objects close to you and describe the experience in detail. Touch something cold, warm, or hot and describe the sensory experience.Olfactory, do become aware of the various smells in your immediate environment.Gustatory, do think back at something you recently tasted, or select something to eat and describe the taste."
- Grounding Techniques for Flashbacks and Panic @ Get Self Help
- Grounding 54321: The Technique That Helped Me Manage My Anxiety @ Stellar - "My friend Lisa – who’s suffered from anxiety since her early teens – introduced me to the Grounding 54321 game; a technique that works by taking your focus off your anxious feelings and causing you to focus on your surroundings instead. Essentially, it’s a distraction trick that – with a bit of effort – takes your mind away from your feeling of uneasiness and brings your focus back to reality. “It’s really helped me,” Lisa said. “When I play the game, I definitely feel more calm after a couple of minutes.” Here’s how to do it:Name five things you can see in the room with you.Name four things you can feel.Name three things you can hear right now.Name two things you can smell right now.Name one good thing about yourself."
.
.
DBT Chain Analysis Training
DBT Validation Strategies
Challenging Absolutes
Cognitive Rehearsal
Systematic Assessment of alternatives
Diversions or distractions
Role PlayingRe-attributing Blame
Relabeling
Cognitive Rehearsal
Systematic Assessment of alternatives
Diversions or distractions
Role PlayingRe-attributing Blame
Relabeling
Reality Testing
Seeking Alternative Explanations
Decatastrophizing
Self-Soothing
wise mind
- A part of DBT includes using wise mind. A question to make sure you are using wise mind is making sure the decision felt right. Now, you may not feel "right" after eating but that is only because society tells you to feel bad. In that moment you felt right about it. It is what you wanted to feed your body and what your body wanted to be feed. You nourished your body with the foods you wanted.
Coping thoughts
- Coping thoughts exercise - " What happened? As a result, what did you think and feel? (Be specific.) What evidence supports how you think and feel? What evidence contradicts how you think and feel? .What’s a more accurate and fair way to think and feel about this situation? What can you do to cope with this situation in a healthy way?
fact /opinion
- FACT or OPINION? @GetSelfHelp - "FACT : Evidence to support its truth, Undisputed. Driven by rational thought Head.. OPINION: Based upon a belief or personal view (Varies according to individuals' knowledge, experience, culture, belief systems etc).Arguable - open to disagreement. Driven and reinforced by emotion.Heart : Fact:You ate food. You ate what you wanted to and how much of it you felt your body wanted.Opinion. You're a bad person because of it. You're disgusting because of it.
people who are well known teachers of dbt
- Debbie Corso @ IG // @Youtube // Official site
"What" skills
Observe
- @ Wikipedia - “This is used to nonjudgmentally observe one’s environment within or outside oneself. It is helpful in understanding what is going on in any given situation.
- DBT recommends developing a "teflon mind," the ability to let feelings and experiences pass without sticking in the mind.”
- DBT Mindfulness WHAT Skills @ True Recovery - “Look at things as they are, and experience them, free from our own thoughts and feelings about them. They just are. It's not a sad girl, it's a girl with tears streaming from her eyes, looking toward the ground”
- Observing @ DBT Self Help - “What we learn is to allow ourselves to experience with awareness, in the moment, whatever is happening, rather than leaving a situation or trying to end an emotion. Generally, the ability to attend to events requires the ability to step back from the event itself. “
- Part Two: The What Skills Observing @ DBT Self Help - “Mindfulness skill of observing is when you keep your mind focused on the same thing. So let's try that. Put your hand right now on the table in front of you or you can put it on your leg. Just pay attention to your hand. All of your attention on the palm. Did you just notice what the palm of your hand felt like? That's noticing. That's just observing. “
- Mindfulness Handout 4a: Ideas for Practicing Observing
- Practicing Observing @ DBT Self Help - “My mind so easily wanders away chattering and worrying nonsensically. When I become aware of it, I pull myself back to the moment.”
- Flash Cards Observing @ DBT Self Help
- Observe and Describe uploaded by Leslie Hoyt
- DBT Skill: Observing / Just Noticing Our Experience @ My Daily DBT
Describe
- @ Wikipedia - “This is used to express what one has observed with the observe skill. It is to be used without judgmental statements. This helps with letting others know what you have observed.”
- Describing @ DBT Self Help - “Describing is an experience that you dislike, like maybe washing dishes, and just noticing everything about it without focusing on your feelings. This is a way to stay in the present and to be mindful about what is going on.”
- “Healing From BPD - Borderline Personality Disorder Blog: How "Describing" Can Slow Down Your Emotional Reaction (DBT)” - “So, instead of jumping from noticing an expression on my boss' face to assuming that it means he is about to fire me, I'd slow down the process and describe everything, like this:Boss' brow is furrowed, his eyes are squinted, and his lips are tight. (It's not enough to just say "Boss looks angry." With describing, you give all of the details that you can observe.)I am noticing that a feeling of anxiety or fear has arisen in me. (Rather than "I am anxious" or "I am afraid." You are noticing the feeling arising within you.) I noticed a thought come up that "he could be coming over to fire me." (Notice how I did not say "He could be coming over to fire me." I said that I noticed a thought, and the content of that thought was "He could be coming over to fire me." This differentiates that a thought does not necessarily equal a fact.)”
- DBT Describing Presentation by Heather Kunz on Prezi
- MyDailyDBT.com: DBT Skill: Describing Without Judgment
Participate
- @ Wikipedia “This is used to become fully focused on, and involved in, the activity that one is doing.”
- Participating @ DBT Self Help - “Participation is about awareness. It’s about being totally present when engaging in an activity.”
- Participate skill by E.T. Carlton - “Participate skill: participate, in this context, means not trying to eliminate it. Anxiety is usually made worse when we attempt to run away from it and we give it power when we put all our energy into avoiding it. So, participate in counting colors by turning your mind fully to just that task.”
About "WHAT" skills
- Dialectical Behavioral Therapy/Core Mindfulness Skills/Participate and Flow - Wikibooks, open books for an open world
- Healing Schemas — DBT Self-Help Resources: Mindfulness “What Skills”...
- The "What" skill @ Shit Borderlines Do
- DBT’s “What” Skills of Mindfulness | Mindfulness Muse - "Consider the multitude of ways that you are distracted from being fully present to the current moment in your daily life. It is often a rare thing to be completely present. Even when we feel like we are particularly calm or focused, there are often multiple thoughts flitting in and out of our minds or distracting physical sensations (e.g., an itch, a pain, etc.). All of these distractions remove us from the present moment and scatter our focus."
- DBT Decoded: Mindfulness “What Skills”
- DBT Skills #8: WHAT the WHAT SKILL uploaded by BrokenBrain Podcast
- DBT Lesson 24 The What Skills @ MD Junction
- What skills DBT - 2016 uploaded by Optimum Performance Institute
How skills
Nonjudgmentally / NON-JUDGMENTAL STANCE
- Being Nonjudgmental uploaded by Leslie Hoyt - “Being non-judgmental is about not assigning a value to yourself or others (such as good, bad, terrible or unlovable.) Describe what is going on, how you feel about it, and how you want to respond to it, without assigning value to yourself or others. Do this: Sometimes I make mistakes...and not: I am a complete failure. do this: Right now I am feeling angry...and not: I am so pissed off, I need to punch something to get rid of this feeling!”
- A Deliberate Practice of Non-Judgment uploaded by BEINGLOVE dorothyratusny
- Mindfulness, a non-judgmental awareness uploaded by OnlineMeditation
- How to Be Non-Judgmental of Yourself and Others @ *Positive Provocations* - Awareness. Understanding. Acceptance.Love Love Love
- What Does It Mean To Be Non-judgmental? By John Kuypers @ Leadership Expert - “We judge because judging gives us the temporary sense that we are in control. To not judge is to feel out of control and even irresponsible. We feel that we are approving actions with which we disagree. This is false. Not judging is not the same as approving. We are only accepting the other person’s freedom to say and do what he or she wants. For example, if a friend begins avoiding you and not reciprocating your efforts to contact him, what thoughts run through your mind? What feelings run through your heart? Do you assume the best or the worst? Do you have thoughts of retribution about the next time he needs you and how you will treat him just as disrespectfully? Suppose you were really counting on this person? What can you do? Keep calling? Send him a letter? What will you write? “Please, pretty please call me?” In reality, he is free to break his promise to you, as hurtful as that may be.”
- How to Be Non-Judgmental @ Rowdy Kittens - “1. Make time to reflect and write. 2. Start practicing compassion.3. Be open to alternative points of view.4. Get your volunteer groove on.”
- "Using a Non-Judgmental Stance to Promote Trustworthiness in Action Res" by Serge Gabarre, Cécile Gabarre et al.
- How to Practice Nonjudgmental Mindfulness @ Mindfulness Muse - (1) Visualize yourself removing the lenses of judgment.(2) Mindfully notice… really see… yourself, others, and the world.(3) Ask wise mind, “What is it that I most deeply want in my life?” Harsh Judgments Inflict Unnecessary Suffering
- Dialectical Behavioral Therapy/Core Mindfulness Skills/Non-Judgmentally - Wikibooks, open books for an open world - All-or-Nothing Thinking.Labeling.Mental Filtering.Over-generalization.Discounting the Positive.Jumping to Conclusions or Mind Reading. Magnification.
- Non-Judgemental Stance @ Healing Schemas - “Open your Mind: Try not to focus on any sort of preconceived notion of what the other person has done “wrong.” Look for and be open to the other person’s perspective. There is no such thing as a true villain; there are only individual perspectives and motivations.”
- Borderline Personality Disorder Blog: DBT | Practicing the "Non-Judgmentally" Emotion Regulation Skill @ Healing From BPD - “See, but DON'T EVALUATE. Take a nonjudgmental stance. Just the facts. Focus on the "what," not the "good" or "bad," the "terrible" or "wonderful," the "should" or "should not." UNGLUE YOUR OPINIONS from the facts, from the "who, what, when, and where."”
- DBT Decoded: Nonjudgmental Stance @ Futures of Palm Beach - “This stance is a commitment to stop judging. Stop judging others and stop judging yourself. Try it! Like all mindfulness skills, it’s not easy, but it’s worthwhile. Do it again and again, and again, it gets a little easier. And you get a little better at it. And it changes you.Take a nonjudgmental stance and you’ll begin to think differently. You’ll learn to replace judgment with compassion. And while it’s nice, and lots of good comes from treating others with compassion.”
- Nonjudgmental Stance Handout and Worksheet.pdf - File Shared from Box
- Non-judgmental Stance @ DBT Self Help - “Sadness is an emotion. It is not good or bad. The fact that I exhibit the symptoms I associate with sadness does not make me a bad person, nor is experiencing the emotion a good or a bad thing. It simply is. Right now, I am experiencing sadness, that’s all. It’s okay to feel sad.”
- Non-judgmental Exercises in Dialectical Behavior Therapy@ Dialectical Behavior Therapy Understood - “ Judging something as neither good nor bad. Everything simply is as it is.”
- Core Mindfulness – Part Three (‘How’ Skill; Taking a non-judgmental stance) @ Life after BPD - “Being judgmental means labeling things is a positive ‘good’ or negative ‘bad’ way. Being non-judgmental means observing without placing these judgments on things, and you will find the more you are non-judgmental, you will start to see things in a different light.”
- Just How Judgmental Are You? @ Addiction.com
- Anything to Stop the Pain – For Non-Borderlines and Loved Ones of People with BPD « Anything to Stop the Pain - BPD and Non-BPDs - “Describing things as good or bad, valuable or worthless, smart or stupid, terrible or wonderful, beautiful or ugly, etc. Describing how things “should” or “shouldn’t” be. Describing by comparing or contrasting.”
- Judgment Exercise - Teal Swan
One-mindfully
- One-Mindfully: Overview @ DBT Self Help - “So the One-mindfulness skill is an effort to help us focus our attention on the here and now, to be able to absorb the DBT information and take part in the present. Please do not judge yourselves about this. This can be a difficult skill for people to learn. It requires lots of practice and willingness. Be patient with yourself.”
- DBT Decoded: One Mindfully @ Futures of Palm Beach - “ When eating a salad one mindfully, consider the origins of each vegetable; imagining the steps it took for each to grow in the sunlight, from seedling to fully-formed. Consider what type of farming practice and other processes must have taken place for it to arrive at market, and ultimately into your salad bowl. The act of mindfulness is the act of noticing new things. When you practice doing things one mindfully, you have the opportunity to notice new things and appreciate a more profound level of experience.”
- Dialectical Behavioral Therapy/Core Mindfulness Skills/One-Mindfully
- One Mindfully: a poem @ True Recovery
- One mindfully in the moment @ Brain Storm - Do one thing at a time. Mindful breathing. Staying present in the moment
- Core Mindfulness – Part Four (‘How’ Skill; One-Mindfully) @ Life after BPD - “Mindfulness cues are an excellent mindfulness technique that are designed to snap you out of the unconscious “autopilot” state of mind, and bring you back into the present moment.”
- Mindfulness HOW: One Mindfully on Vimeo
- Healing From BPD - Borderline Personality Disorder Blog: One Thing at a Time... (DBT: One-Mindfully) - “DO ONE THING AT A TIME. When you are eating, eat. When you are walking, walk. When you are bathing, bathe. When you are working, work. When you are in a group or a conversation, focus your attention on the very moment you are in with another person. When you are thinking, think. When you are worrying, worry. When you are planning, plan. When you are remembering, remember. Do each thing with all of your attention.If other actions, or other thoughts, or strong feelings distract you, LET GO OF DISTRACTIONS and go back to what you are doing - again, and again, and again.CONCENTRATE YOUR MIND. If you are doing two things at once, stop and go back to one thing at a time" (page 113, Mindfulness Handout 3).”
Effectively
- Effectively Use Skills @ DBT Self Help - “The goal of this lesson is to focus on being effective -- to focus on doing what works, rather than what is "right" versus "wrong" or "fair" versus "unfair." Another way to think of it is as the opposite of "cutting off your nose to spite your face."”
- Core Mindfulness – Part Five (‘How’ Skill; Being effective) @ Life after BPD - “Avoid wishing things were different – wishing just doesn’t work – you need to use skills instead.Forget any feelings of injustice – This causes anger, hurt and stress.”
- Doing What’s Effective @ Mindfulness Muse - “Be mindful of your thoughts and feelings.
- Avoid judging the situation or your thoughts/feelings/actions.Choose actions that are both appropriate and designed to move you closer to your goals.Do the best you can in the moment.
- DBT Decoded: Mindfulness "How Skills" in Action - “ To be effective means that we progress and strengthen our mindful muscles as we move along. “
Distress tolerance
ACCEPTS
ACCEPTS stands for:
Activities. Distract yourself with some activities. Do you like to nerd out with the rubik's cube? Do you like to write poetry, or knit? Pick an activity and work on it to keep your mind off how you are feeling.
Contributing - Contribute to your community. Give 5 dollars to a charity. Donate old clothing, maybe clothing that is too big or too small? If you love reading, maybe you could go to a nursing home or even a hospital and read to the tenets there?
Comparisons - Compare your situations to others' situations. This doesn't work for everyone, but for some people it does help thinking they could be "worse off."
Opposite Emotions - Feel fat and disgusting, try thinking you are fat and sexy. Anything you are feeling, tell yourself you are feeling the opposite.
Pushing Away - Those negative emotions, write them down and throw it away, to repel those negative emotions.
Thoughts - concentrate on thinking about something else. How many tiles are on the floor, what recipes would you like to try,etc.
Sensations - Use music (hearing), Food (taste), Pet a cat or doggies or soft blanket (touch), Look at nice pictures or watch a great movie or even look at food and recipes (sight), *Snapping rubber band, sucking on ice, putting ice on your skin,digging nails into your skin but don't break the skin,etc.)
Activities. Distract yourself with some activities. Do you like to nerd out with the rubik's cube? Do you like to write poetry, or knit? Pick an activity and work on it to keep your mind off how you are feeling.
Contributing - Contribute to your community. Give 5 dollars to a charity. Donate old clothing, maybe clothing that is too big or too small? If you love reading, maybe you could go to a nursing home or even a hospital and read to the tenets there?
Comparisons - Compare your situations to others' situations. This doesn't work for everyone, but for some people it does help thinking they could be "worse off."
Opposite Emotions - Feel fat and disgusting, try thinking you are fat and sexy. Anything you are feeling, tell yourself you are feeling the opposite.
Pushing Away - Those negative emotions, write them down and throw it away, to repel those negative emotions.
Thoughts - concentrate on thinking about something else. How many tiles are on the floor, what recipes would you like to try,etc.
Sensations - Use music (hearing), Food (taste), Pet a cat or doggies or soft blanket (touch), Look at nice pictures or watch a great movie or even look at food and recipes (sight), *Snapping rubber band, sucking on ice, putting ice on your skin,digging nails into your skin but don't break the skin,etc.)
- Wise Mind Accepts By The Wise Movement
- Distress Tolerance - DBT Skills - Wise Mind ACCEPTS Recovery Mum - In this video I talk about the first skill of distress tolerance - Distracting. If you want some skills to put in place when dealing with distress or pain then watch this video. I used to either drink, use drugs, self harm or attempt suicide whenever I dealt with a painful situation. These skills helped me immensely."
- DBT ACCEPTS uploaded by Matt Cleaver - critical of it, but a good watch because not everything works for everyone.
- DBT Skills Workshop #2: ACCEPTS uploaded by BrokenBrain Podcast
- -Distress Tolerance Wise Mind ACCEPTS!!!
- ACCEPTS @ DBT Self Help - Activities , Contributing. Comparisons[this may not work for everyone. If it doesn't work for you, skip it.]. Emotions.Pushing Away.Thoughts.Sensations
- Distress Tolerance – Part One (Distracting – A.C.C.E.P.T.S) | Life after BPD - "There are four skills taught within this module;Distracting.Self Soothing.Improving the moment.Pro’s and con’s
- Tolerate Distress with A-C-C-E-P-T-S @ Mindfulness Muse - "How we can we learn how to use the DBT mnemonic device A-C-C-E-P-T-S to distract from distress in a healthy way and self-soothe? Depressed & Anxious: The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Workbook for Overcoming Depression and Anxiety (Marra, 2004) offers helpful explanations for how to use A-C-C-E-P-T-S in moment of extreme distress or suffering."
- The "Wise Mind" ACCEPTS with DBT - Futures of Palm Beach - "In the case of ACCEPTS, a DBT distress tolerance skillset, the immediate goal is to distract the mind just long enough to intervene in an emotional response to a stressful situation. Like all skills, the more we practice, the more efficient we become with our ability to call upon it when needed. So, let’s do a little DBT decoding and explore how our Wise Mind ACCEPTS."
Self-soothe
IMPROVE
Pros and cons
Radical acceptance
Turning the mind
Willingness vs. willfulness
Emotion regulation
Story of emotion
- DBT skills for Anxiety-Driven Behaviors by Jonathan Mitchell @ Linkedin - “The story of emotion helps adolescents recognize the triggers for anxiety, the reinforcing impact of avoidance or over attention, as well as the consequences of these behaviors (Linehan, 1993a). It also helps the adolescent to reframe the thoughts about the triggers that cause the anxiety.”
- @ Wkipedia - “This skill is used to understand what kind of emotion one is feeling. Prompting event.Interpretation of the event.Body sensations.Body language.Action urge.Action.Emotion name, based on previous items on list.”
- Parenting a Child with Intense Emotions Using Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) @ MentalHelp - “...the story of emotion, from the source of an emotion to the function of emotions. It emphasizes understanding what makes a particular child vulnerable to intense emotion, his or her triggers and the beliefs that influence an emotional response.”
- The Story of Emotion @ Dialectical Behavior Therapy & Mindfulness Strategies - “Prompting Event: Something happens.Interpretation: What do you think about he prompting event? Body Response: What physical sensations do you feel? How does your face change? Verbal Communication: Can you name the emotion? Can you communicate it verbally to others? Action Urges: What do you feel
PLEASE
Physical illness
balance Eating - Don't eat too much junk food, although so many companies are making healthier junk food (amy's, annies,etc.- put healthier options for junk food)
avoid mood-Altering drugs - Getting smashed at a rave because you are in a downward spiral is a lot different than going to a retreat and using MDMA ,etc.
balance Sleep
get Exercise
balance Eating - Don't eat too much junk food, although so many companies are making healthier junk food (amy's, annies,etc.- put healthier options for junk food)
avoid mood-Altering drugs - Getting smashed at a rave because you are in a downward spiral is a lot different than going to a retreat and using MDMA ,etc.
balance Sleep
get Exercise
- Healing From BPD - Borderline Personality Disorder Blog: PLEASE Prevent Emotional Vulnerability (DBT) - “Just think of the last time you got very hungry but couldn't immediately eat (i.e., in a traffic jam with no food available). In my experience, low blood sugar is a trigger. I quickly become irritable and anxious. I now try my best to make sure I have a snack in my purse at all times so that I don't make irrational, impulsive decisions based on an emotional reaction to the low blood sugar. Making sure we keep our blood sugar balanced is just one of the things we need to do to maintain equilibrium in our bodies.”
- Reduce Vulnerability to negative emotions @ DBT Self Help - “If we are feeling sick, hungry, tired, under the influence of drugs, don't get much exercise or aren't doing something in our day that gives us a sense of mastery or accomplishment, we are more likely to be vulnerable to negative emotions, to experience or see the negative than the positive, less able to handle situations and interactions with our wise mind.”
- DBT Skills - PLEASE Master uploaded by HFinAZ
- DBT Tiger (PLEASE MASTER (emotion regulation)) - “The PLEASE skills focus on things you can do to reduce your vulnerability. Being sick can lower your resistance to being able to tolerate distress. You’re fatigued, you’re not feeling well, so if something else goes wrong, it’s much easier to fall into bad thoughts or behaviors. Too much or too little food can also increase your vulnerability. Any drugs, like alcohol, cigarettes, marijuana, cocaine, heroin, MDMA, etc. alter your mood and your mind and make you more vulnerable. They can also alter your body chemistry, which in turn alters your brain chemistry. Sleeping on a regular schedule is also important, because if you’re sleeping too little or too much, you are groggy and unable to handle day to day happenings. Finally, it’s important to get some sort of physical activity (this doesn’t mean excessive activity or exercise), because this can be distracting, make you feel accomplished, and lead to release of positive brain chemicals. “
- ABC PLEASE Emotion Regulation Skills - Ep. 4f - DBT Peer Connections uploaded by DBT Peer Connections
- PLEASE Skills Journal Entry Mixed Media Collage @ Michelle Morgan
- DBT Skills Group – Emotion Regulation Week 6: ABC & PLEASE | Living with Borderline Personality Disorder - “One of the therapists ‘D’ expressed the importance of this skill by explaining to us the following: “As adults, we are really just big babies, especially physiologically, and our bodies need looking after in much the same way.” He continued: “Would you deny your baby of food for a day? Would you keep them awake all night long? What would happen if you refused to let them run around and play? And if you never changed their nappies or washed them? How about if they were screaming in agony with pain and you simply left them there? What if you fed them alcohol or cocaine to live on? How do you think they would be, feel and experience life?”
Build mastery
- Building Mastery and Positive Experiences @ Drug Rehab in Utah - “So, the build mastery skill is doing something you're good at to make you feel competent, confident, and in control. It should be somewhat challenging and something you can do in the moment. Recently, I got dumped so I turned to my skills of jewelry making, candle making, and writing poetry, to help get me out of a funk and create positive emotions. This skill totally works! I love it! Healthy hobbies and mastery skills create successful recovery!”
- DBT Diary: Build Mastery by Michelle Morgan - “Build Mastery is about doing one thing every day that makes you feel competent & in control of your life.”
- Building Mastery @ We Got So Far To Go - “This is the process of doing something new/difficult/fulfilling in some way and feeling a sense of accomplishment after you do it. “
- Healing From BPD - Borderline Personality Disorder Blog: DBT Golden Nugget: Build Mastery Skill - “According to Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), doing activities that make us feel confident and accomplished, even small tasks, fall under a category of skills called "Build Mastery."
- A DBT Skill To Feel Motivated and Confident @ HealthyPlace - “do anything that builds mastery. It doesn’t have to be regarding the goal above. It could be that you do something that makes you feel more in control of your life. For one of my clients, even if she didn’t get her homework done, she would try and do one thing to make her feel in control and confident, such as take her medication or eat a healthy meal. After she does this (yay), she often feels motivated, realizing that she is doing something that makes her confident and in control, also known as, building mastery.”
- DBT Decoded: Build Mastery @ Futures of Palm Beach - “Building mastery is about committing to something and seeing it through. For the individual in recovery, it may mean reigniting a passion to do something that was abandoned when substance abuse took over. Getting back to a creative endeavor, such as painting, cooking or writing can be therapeutic and fuel self-esteem. It also could be about trying something new. If you’ve always wanted to learn a new language, try yoga or go hiking, just finding the courage to begin something new is a form of mastery. If you’ve contemplated doing it and never did, then the act of doing it once, for any length of time is an accomplishment.”
- MyDailyDBT.com: DBT: Build Your Self-Esteem Through Building Mastery - “ We can still follow through even when we "don't feel like it," and doing so will feel great! Choosing to practice the Build Mastery skill allows us to enjoy a sense of accomplishment.
Opposite action
- Reduce Anxiety by Acting Opposite to How You’re Feeling @ Dialectical Behavior Therapy Understood - “Acting opposite to how you’re feeling only works when:The fear is not justified. Fear is justified when a situation is a threat to your life, health, or well being. You do opposite action all the way. Not just by acting opposite to how you’re feeling, but also by thinking opposite to how you’re feeling.”
- MyDailyDBT.com: DBT: Opposite to Emotion Action (An Emotion Regulation Skill) - “When we are experiencing an emotion that we want to change, we practice a DBT skill called "Opposite to Emotion Action," during which we change our emotion by acting in a way opposite to the current uncomfortable emotion.Here's an example. If you're sitting in class and you begin to feel very anxious, the action impulse is probably to run and get out of the class. If you were to practice Opposite Action, you would stay seated and allow the impulse to pass. Soon thereafter, the anxiety attack would end, and you would have successfully stayed for the duration of your class.”
- DBT Skills: Working with Primary & Secondary Emotions @ DBT Peer Connections - Small list of emotions and what to do for the opposite reaction.
- Opposite Action Part 1 @DBT Self Help - “Now the second point is, if the emotion has an action that means the emotion causes the action. You can actually change the emotion by changing the action. In other words, not only do emotions cause actions, but actions cause emotions. And you can change your emotion by changing your action. “
- Opposite Action Part 4 @ DBT Self Help - “Step 2: Figure out what is the action of the emotion. In other words, ask yourself 'What's the emotion trying to get me to do?' Step 3: Ask yourself, 'Do I really want to reduce this emotion?' It's going to be hard to do opposite action if you don't want to reduce the emotion. So assuming that you say 'Yes' you want to reduce that emotion., then you go to...Step 4: And you have to figure out what is the opposite action. What's the action opposite to the action of the emotion? So those are the first for steps.”
- Opposite Emotion uploaded by Leslie Hoyt
- DBT Peer Connections Ep 4c – Emotion Regulation Opposite Action uploaded by DBT Peer Connections
- 5 Ways to Use Opposite Action with Anxiety Disorder @ Treating Anxiety - HealthyPlace - “3.When you feel like lashing out — Anger is a major part of my anxiety disorder. The frustration and constant tension make me want to take it out on people who really don’t deserve it. I’ve also found that lashing out generally makes things worse. So, I’m learning to walk away, which is the opposite of annihilating people who tick me off. When you want to lash out, pause and take a deep breath. How important is it, really? Is it worth the added grief you’ll end up causing yourself?”
- Opposite Action - a mood boosting technique that is a favourite among many of my therapy clients. By Dr Alice Boyes - “When you feel angry try expressing sympathy or empathy....When you’re feeling sad / when something has gone wrong Doing something that’s generous and caring towards others can help. For example, offering help to someone that needs it at work.”
- Healing From BPD - Borderline Personality Disorder Blog: Opposite To Emotion Action and "Justified" Emotions (DBT) - “Identify Emotion
- DBT Decoded: Choosing the Opposite Action @ Futures of Palm Beach - Identify the action of the emotion.Ask yourself if you want to change the emotion.Determine the Opposite Action of the Emotion.Do the Opposite Action.”
- "Fortunately, the reasonable side of our brain kicks in and reminds us that we also cannot repair, improve or establish new relationships if we isolate ourselves. The right answer is for us to choose the opposite action – to become socially active, try new things and realize that facing the unknown is part of what makes life interesting and worth living. This is also where calling upon other DBT teachings is helpful. By acting mindfully we can stop living in the past and embrace the possibilities that exist in the present moment."
- Opposite to Emotion Action@ Mindfulness Therapy Associates - “Use Mindfulness to notice the emotion, the action urge (and, if possible, the prompting event and the interpretations of the prompting event).Ask yourself, is this emotion justified or unjustified? Don’t suppress the emotion, when we suppress emotions, they just get bigger. Emotions are not the problem – urges and/or intensity are the problems.Ask yourself, if the emotion is justified, if the intensity of the emotion is justified or helpful. If the emotion is not justified or the intensity of the emotion is not helpful:Do the opposite of the emotional urge.Do all the way Opposite Action.”
- 10 Practical Examples of Opposite Action @Mindfulness Muse Part 1 // Part 2 - “If the idea of applying opposite action to painful or overwhelming emotions seems confusing or difficult to imagine putting into practice, it may be helpful to explore some practical examples of opposite action. As you read through the following emotional experiences and how to apply opposite action to them, try to reflect on your own typical emotional responses. We are all capable of a wide variety of complex emotions, but most of us have patterns or habits regarding our emotional responses to events. Becoming mindful of your personal tendencies can help you become more adept at recognizing your emotions more clearly and feeling confident in how to most effectively regulate the emotion.”
- Opposite to Emotion Action @ DBT Self Help - “For example, if we are angry, there are many actions that we might take to express our angry feelings. But if the action that we take is one that is opposite to the emotion we feel, like walking away from a situation when we are angry, or distracting ourselves with something nice, then we have put our energy into something that is eventually going to make us feel better. In this way, we not only reversed our action (walked away instead of yelling at someone), but we also began to make a change in our angry feelings. We didn't escalate or heighten our feelings, but did something that made the feelings decrease, by putting something positive in their place.”
Problem solving
- DBT Options for Solving Problems @ Shit Borderlines Do - “Option 1: Stay Miserable or, Make Things Worse, by creating other, new problems for yourself.” “Option 2: Tolerate The Problem this involves accepting that the problem is happening, and tolerating both the problem itself and your responses to the problem.” “Option 3: Feel Better About The Problem this involves changing or regulating your emotional response to the problem.” “Option 4: Solve The Problem this involves changing the situation, or avoiding, leaving, or getting out of the situation for good.”
- No Matter What The Problem, There's Only Four Things You Can Do @ The Emotionally Sensitive Person - “Marsha Linehan, the creator of Dialectical Behavior Therapy, outlined strategies for any problem that you face. Remembering these options can help decrease the struggle of not knowing what to do. The four options are Solve the Problem, Change Your Perception of the Problem, Radically Accept the Situation, or Stay Miserable.”
- Got a Problem? The Good News Is You Only Have Four Options @ Psychology Today - “A key variable to remember is how difficult it is to make changes in behavior. A strong commitment to change is important. Be specific in stating the change you want to make. Be willing to make small changes at first.Implement the Solution: Take action. Trouble-shoot as you go along, tweaking it to resolve any issues you didn't anticipate.”
- Problem Solving Emotion Regulation Skills - Ep. 4d - DBT Peer Connections uploaded by DBT Peer Connections - “In this video, you learn the dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) emotion regulation skill problem solving, that is how to figure out what to do when you are experiencing intense or unwanted emotions. In the previous two videos (4b, 4c) you learned the emotion regulation skills check the facts and opposite action. In the problem solving video you will learn how to put all three together to generate solutions for emotional situations. If you have any comments or questions you can send Rachel Gill an email at [email protected] or you can check out DBT Peer Connections website at ilovedbt.com”
Interpersonal effectiveness
DEARMAN
- DBT: Getting what you want using DEAR MAN skills uploaded by Roanne Program - “A playful video on practicing the DBT skill set of DEAR MAN to get what you want/get your needs met. For adolescents and young adults practicing Interpersonal Effectiveness.”
- Guidelines for Objective Effectiveness: @ DBT Self Help - 1. Describe the current interaction.2. Express your opinions/feelings of discomfort about the interaction. 3. Assert your wishes. 4. Reinforce
- DBT Skills Group – Interpersonal Effectiveness Week 2: DEARMAN @ Living with Borderline Personality Disorder - “When you are trying to get something you want or need from another person, because it involves somebody else – and because ultimately we cannot control other people – there is unfortunately no guarantee that the request will be successful. However, following this guideline will certainly maximise the chances. Furthermore, it will hopefully maintain the relationship as well as your self-respect as a natural consequence as well.”
- Using “D-E-A-R M-A-N” to Get What You Want @ Mindfulness Muse - “Without this open communication, relationships can foster resentment, unmet needs, and hurt feelings. One caveat to learning how to ask for what you need from others: you’re not guaranteed to get it! Even the most skilled communicators don’t always get what they want. However, there is a certain delicateness to learning how to gracefully accept hearing “no” from someone you care about.”
- 1.17 | Communicate - D.E.A.R.M.A.N. Technique @ BPD Family Forum - “....Our partner is super sensitive and tends to over-react. We get ever more careful, stopping to ask for things needed in our or our relationship's interest. Resentment breeds. Resentment is sensed. Communication grinds to a halt. How do we get back to normal? A big step is start asking again for what is needed and this is where D.E.A.R.M.A.N can help us.”
- DBT Decoded: Using DEAR MAN Skills @ Futures of Palm Beach - “The beauty of DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) is that regardless of whether you’re recovering from the disease of addiction or you’re simply someone looking to improve your relationship with yourself and others – DBT skills are a perfect fit. Today’s topic, the Interpersonal Effectiveness acronym DEAR MAN, is an excellent example. DEAR MAN can be thought of as a group of tactics that help you get what you want, whether you’re negotiating a promotion at work or saying no to a persuasive salesperson (who just may be your best friend).”
- DBT Skill ‘FAST’ & ‘DEARMAN’ in action @ Life after BPD
GIVE
Gentle
Interested
Validate
Easy Manner
Interested
Validate
Easy Manner
- G.I.V.E- relationship effectiveness skills ( DBT) uploaded by The Borderline Life
- DBT GIVE Skills Lesson by Roanne Program (OPI) uploaded by Roanne Program
- Use Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) GIVE Skills to Get and Keep Important Relationships by Roanne Program - “People are a lot more likely to respond positively to gentleness than harshness.” “Really listen to what the other person is saying. Pay attention, and avoid the temptation to be thinking about and preparing what you want to say while the other person is still talking”“See if you can determine what part of your request the other person does not like or is not comfortable with, then acknowledge his or her feelings or problems. ‘I know that you are extremely busy, but….’ “Don’t make demands, harass or nag. Try including a sincere compliment or a giving a little special attention to the person.”
- DBT Skills Group – Interpersonal Effectiveness Week 3: GIVE @ Living with Borderline Personality Disorder - “(be) Gentle – quite simply, this reminds us to be gentle, kind and respectful in how we approach the other person. It consists of 4 main aspects: No attacks: try to stay away from blaming, shaming or accusing the other person. People are likely to become defensive if they feel they are being attacked, and this will get you further away from reaching your desired goals.No threats: do not ‘manipulate’ the other person or be passive aggressive in your tone. Even if you get your immediate needs met by threatening something like “If you don’t do X, I will hurt myself”, it is not going to helpful in maintaining the relationship healthily long-term. No judging: try to stay away from telling the other person what they ‘should’ be doing or what they have done ‘wrong’. Of course, don’t label them with words which are likely to hurt them. Try and stay descriptive. No disrespect: if you treat someone with respect, it is much more likely to be reciprocated. Be wary of urges such as eye-rolling, walking away, ignoring, belittling, etc. Treat the other person as you would like them to treat you.”
- DBT 18: G I V E @ Group Think - “It’s kinda like my lifetime rule of “Don’t be a dick” or “Be excellent to each other.””
- Guidelines for Relationship Effectiveness @ DBT Self Help
- DBT Decoded: GIVE a little bit @ Future of Palm Beach - “GIVE is the type of DBT acronym we like most. It’s short, so it’s easier to remember – and keeping these ideas in mind result in the practice of good relationship hygiene. We know that these actions make sense because this is how we want others to treat us. If someone fails to GIVE us the respect we deserve, we can practice a bit of self-validation and look elsewhere for a promising relationship!”
- DBT Skills ~G.I.V.E.~ uploaded by Healthy Futures
- GIVE
FAST
Fair
No apologies
Stick to values
Truthful
No apologies
Stick to values
Truthful
- F. A. S. T. DBT skill @ Healing Schemas “When dealing with interpersonal situations, it’s sometimes hard to keep (or get some) self-respect. We sometimes sacrifice it to get what we want or we give it up for the sake of the relationship. If you want to keep (or get some) self-respect, make sure you use the following skills:” *Click on link to see*
- DBT FAST Skills Tutorial from Roanne Program uploaded by Roanne Program
- Use Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) FAST Skills to Balance Keeping Relationships with Keeping Respect for Yourself @ Roanne Program - “ Don’t put the other person’s needs or desires above your own, or keep your needs or desires to yourself.... Don’t expect the other person to always accommodate your preferences, and don’t accept never having yours considered or honored.” “Building mindfulness around over-apologizing can help you to break the habit and raise your self-respect.” “Don’t do anything that goes against what you know to be right for YOU. “ “Remember, telling only partial truths or omitting facts are also ways of being untruthful and can be harmful to relationships!”
- Guidelines for Self-respect Effectiveness @ DBT Self Help
- Think FAST @ Futures of Palm Beach
- DBT FAST Skills: A Real Life Example @ OPI Living - “Self-respect effectiveness is needed in every interaction and you can always check in with yourself to see if you are maintaining your self-respect by asking yourself a few questions: Do you stand up for your peer group’s values or your own? Do you put on a tough attitude to avoid humiliating yourself, but at the same time lose self-respect by being mean and tough? Do you lie or tell the truth? Do you act competent or incompetent?”
- DBT Skills Group – Interpersonal Effectiveness Week 4: FAST @ Living with Borderline Personality Disorder - “Where DEARMAN = Objectives Effectiveness, and GIVE = Relationship Effectiveness, the FAST skill is used to nurture Self-Respect Effectiveness. Although it can be helpful in a range of contents, generally it is used in conjunction with the DEARMAN skill. When used in this way, the aim is to achieve your objective within the relationship, whilst maintaining or boosting your self-respect both during and after the interaction at the same time.”